New Year Greetings
May you have more money this year than last year.
May you drive a bigger car this year.
May you have a bigger house this year.
May your brother-in-law get out of jail.
May your mother-in-law move out.
May you be acquitted.
May your father-in-law always have bail money.
May your dog scoop his own poop.
May your partner return with your safe.
May your neighbor return with your wife.
May your accountant find more loopholes.
May your lawyer find your accountant.
May you find a Bluetooth system that's covered by dental insurance.
May all your ex's move to Texas.
May your medical premiums cost less than your son's medical school.
May your cable repair guy get there while you still live there.
May you find a toupee with velcro.
May you lose a few pounds so you don't have to use the freight elevator.
May your laser eye surgery be successful so you can stop getting into cop cars and saying, "To the airport, please."
And if you should wake up from this ridiculous dream, may you have enough sleeping pills to get back to sleep.
Happy New Year!
Published by Josh Greenberger
Josh Greenberger is the author of the book "The V-Bang", which addresses the following issues: How did the universe begin? Where did all the matter in the universe come from? Why is the universe exp... View profile
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