New York State Department of Motor Vehicles (NYS DMV): A Customer Service Review

For most New Yorkers, going to the Department of Motor Vehicles (DMV) ranks right up there with having a root canal.

The New York State (NYS) DMV is a necessary evil. It really is necessary. And it really is evil.

The NYS DMV is necessary:

When my diver's license renewal notice came in the mail I groaned at the sight of the envelop. If I wanted an Enhanced Driver's License (EDL) I could not renew by mail. (The EDL allows car, pedestrian and boat travel to Canada, Mexico, and the Caribbean.) For only $30 more it's wise to have an EDL, so I reluctantly prepared myself to go to the DMV.

As long as I had to go, and given the fact that we live so close Canada that we regularly travel there by car, I though I'd get an Enhanced Identification Card (EID) for my 14 year old son. I dutifully went to the NYS DMV website to find out what I needed to bring with us.

The NYS DMV is evil:

The night before the dreaded DMV trek, I gathered all the information that we both needed: original birth certificates with raised seal, original Social Security cards with pillars, proof of residence, note from priest describing latest confession. Well, maybe not the last one.

My son though that I was nuts as I checked and double checked our documents. At 14, he was a NYS DMV virgin.

The next day we arrived at the DMV 15 minutes before it opened. We were numbers three and four in line. I pointed out our good spot to my teenage son, who would have crawled under a rock if I hadn't been whispering. And if there was a rock.

He always thinks I'm unnecessarily uptight. In my defense, there were at least 30 people behind us by the time the doors opened.

We were able to get to the counter in a very timely fashion where our document presentation was accepted. (Hooray! It pays to be uptight- he just doesn't know it yet.)

"Please step to your left for your pictures," the kind lady informed us. We did.

As we stood waiting, I pointed out the "Now Serving" board. The estimated wait time was 0 minutes. But no one had gotten past the counter yet. OK, it's all cool.

The NYS DMV SNAFU:

Oh, but wait. The camera's not working. A new lady called technical support. We stood there as the line behind us grew and grew. For 70 minutes.

I finally asked the lady if I should try another office.

"No," she said,"If the camera doesn't work here it doesn't work anywhere."

"What should I do?" I asked.

No response.

I tried another approach by asking, "Do you know how long it will be?"

Wrong question! She about bit my head off!

At this point my son wanted to know if I wanted to leave. I tried to explain that if we leave we'll just have to come back another day and start at square one. We've already got an hour and a half invested in this. We need these cards.

He was starting to understand the NYS DMV.

ANOTHER LADY CAME BEHIND THE COUNTER, FLICKED A SWITCH, TURNED TO THE MEAN LADY AND SAID, "YOU DIDN'T TURN THE CAMERA ON!" (After 80 minutes!)

The mean lady got defensive and hostile toward that little angel who turned the camera on. I stood there trying not to let my jaw drop.

She called my son and I up to have our pictures taken. Suffice it to say, my EDL photo does not look good.

The silver lining:

The angel at the DMV then gave us a "C" ticket, which allowed us to skip the now 57 minute wait. (God bless her!) But we still has to wait for processing. Long story short, we got out of the DMV three hours and fifteen minutes after we got there. And that was with them treating us as one customer!

On the way home my son barraged me with questions. I told him that basically, yes, this is what you have to go through in NYS if you want to drive or have a state ID. The one bright spot in that came out of this was that as I looked at my son, he actually looked back at me with respect. I'll cherish that.

Here's the kicker:

With all the warm fuzzies I almost forgot to mention that the NYS EDL's and EID's have a microchip in them.

Here's the kicker: cell phones deactivate the chip!

So if you get to the border, and Border Control can't read the chip, "Hasta la vista, baby!". (Or "Bonnee journee, bebe!", as the case may be.) We were advised to keep our EDL (and EID) in the foil-lined protective sleeve that's mailed with it. Talk about an NYS DMV EDL SNAFU!

*Kay Whittenhauer is a freelance writer residing in Rochester, NY. To read more of her work on Associated Content, please click here.