Nightmare in Tea Party County

It all happened the other day. I was driving across country and when I stopped in a shopping center, a person wearing a badge on his suit jacket approached the car. He showed his official identification which seemed very weird to me. He was an official taxman for the county. I thought I had become the victim of a cruel con game and decided to ignore him. He flagged down a police officer who threatened to arrest me if I didn't cooperate with the taxman.

This was unbelievable. But I decided to cooperate. The taxman asked me for my identity card. I showed him my driver's license. He told me that was not what he asked for and repeated his request. I told him that I had never heard of an identity card. The police officer issued me a ticket for not having an identity card and a summons to appear in court. The ticket contained a two hundred dollar fine. I stared at it in disbelief and started having a temper fit.

That landed me in a jail cell. When I saw the judge the next morning I was given an additional $200 fine. Then they drove me to city hall where I had to fill out a form for an identity card. To my surprise, my voter registration was needed because the application requested how I registered: as a democrat, republican or independent. Now I was more confused than ever. I had never heard of anything like this before!

Afterward, they drove me back to my car where the taxman proceeded with his request for my identity card. After acknowledging that I was an independent voter, he charged me two $1 taxes. One for not being a registered as a Republican and one for not being registered as an Independent!

The taxman told me that taxmen are dispersed throughout the city and that I may be paying this tax multiple times before I finally return to my home. That's when my wife woke me up. She claimed that I had been angrily cursing and swearing, swinging my fists in the air and violently rocking to and fro in the bed.