NIU Shootings on Valentine's Day 2008

Northern Illinois University suffered a traumatic event today. Many news stations and related media sources report that several students were shot by a gunman of 18-20 years old. The gunman Steve Kazmierczak is no longer, and Niu reports there are twenty-two injured students and six fatalities treated mostly at Kishwaukee Hospital. Thoughts of the Valentine's Day Massacre run through my head.

I happened to be in the Holmes Student Center when it went down. Many students were just going about their hectic lives when a man out of breathe runs into the computer lab, and says shots have been fired. I thought he was joking at first, so I went back to searching for scholarships and loans on the computer. Then students start reacting by asking if the shootings are really going on, where, and what do we do now, because a person just doesn't run into a university computer lab and say something like that. The man informing us of the shootings then called the police, and we just sat there in disbelief for not knowing what to think or do. At that moment we witness a group of frightened students shuffling past the computer lab windows, some are crying and on their cell phones. We knew something was wrong then.

Events continue to unfold as a computer lab attendant rushes in and instructs us to get off the computers. We then shuffle into the lounge area, where the other frightened students are already crowded around the TV and the radio. Then an NIU employee tells us to stay put. After sitting there for what seemed like forever, the same NIU employee tells us we are on lock down. Leaving the area from this point on isn't an option.

I started becoming more and more upset as time progressed, so talking to another Niu student was calming. Corey told me about wanting to be a dance instructor and I told her I was studying sociology no less. We then talked about our families for awhile. I then willed myself to choke back the fear rising within me, for not wanting to unnerve younger students already upset. After awhile I had to walk away from the TV and the radio, for the reality was too much. Students kept trying to reach their family members on their cell phones, but reception isn't that great in the basement of the NIU Holmes Student Center.

Some students were glued to the TV and some to the radio, but a few others remained disconnected as I searched out faces in the room for reassurance. After about an hour of watching, listening and pacing, the NIU employee tells us we can leave. The students bolt, and I was eager get out of there, for the tension in the room was unbearable. Everybody reacts differently, for I managed to carry on a conversation with a complete stranger about my life. It helped momentarily, because doing something comforting in the midst of a threatening situation calms the people in it. I am still in as much disbelief now, as I was when walking by Cole Hall after the shootings happened. The scene of police, of ambulances, and of helicopters was very surreal.

Many students either walked around or meandered into the fast food places nearby. I followed suit and walked to Burger King for a slice of pie. Yet the objective reality hit me harder when I noticed the three TV's in the upper corners of the dining area. Determined to comfort myself and the emotions rising up within, I sat down and tried to eat my pie, but the news of the shootings materialized on all three TV's. After that I couldn't help myself, and I ran into the women's bathroom and broke down. Since then I have shed many tears, especially when talking to my family.

NIU students are in disbelief and will be for some time, as we slowly piece-meal the routines hopefully leading to comfort and the events leading to the shootings. Routine can only help so much however, as counselors will be available on the Northern Illinois University campus for some time to come. I know I will be stopping by to talk about it. As for continuing my education, I may opt for on line classes in the future. Right now I am still processing the unfolding of events.