No Family Feuds Over My Grandmother's Inheritance

My grandmother is 87 and still as sharp as ever. The daughter of an entrepreneur who made his fortune before the age of forty, she inherited a tidy fortune together with her brother. The rumor goes that the inheritance was divided unfairly, though my grandmother will never speak of it. And yet, she has made it clear that the inheritance she leaves to her loved ones will be so clearly divided as to prevent any family feuds. Here's what her wisdom is guiding her to do.

Talk About It

Unlike many who feel a reluctance to speak about death, my grandmother went straight down to business. She asked her daughters what valuable items in her house they would like to have in their own homes one day. Then she divided the items based on their value, so for example if one daughter would have the piano, the other would have the dining room set. This list was included in the Will to prevent family feuds over the inheritance.

Egalitarianism

I'm sure my grandmother has a favorite grandchild, but to us she keeps saying that we are each her favorite for different reasons. Accordingly, we will each inherit exactly as much as the other. Why? Because in the luxury apartment complex now being built on my grandmother's land, each of her grandchildren will inherit an apartment. In this way, she will give us the gift of a mortgage-free existence. And there will be no family feuding over an inheritance which is identical.

My Wish

When we try to make light of the inheritance question, my grandmother insists that money can lead to bad feelings even among close siblings. Perhaps she speaks from experience; in any case, she has made it clear that whatever we inherit has nothing to do with our wish. It is her wish. And she asks that we remember this in future, so that if any of us feels short-changed, we would feel anger towards the dead not the living. Then all family feuds over inheritance will become null and void.

Surprise, Surprise!

Leaving much of her financial investments a secret, my grandmother admits that she wants to surprise her family after her death. She wants them to be so pleased with the sudden improvement in their financial situation that they will not have time to bicker over who got what. Contentment, she believes, has a way of diffusing family feuds over inheritance.

Priceless

With sentimental items, the memories attached to them are of far greater value than their monetary worth. My grandmother divided the silver sculptures made by my talented grandfather by asking her daughters to pick favorites. She did the same with her jewelry, which she inherited from her mother. Such priceless items, she feels, should not be left to family feuds over inheritance.

Overall Value

With her attorney, my grandmother had her estate accurately valued. To each daughter she intends to leave 50% of her existing fortune. To her grandchildren she promises the apartments being built, which count as future wealth. This fair approach reflects my grandmother's attitude to her family; we are each equally important in her life.

There's a stigma around talking about what you will inherit. It's said to be greedy, commercial, cold and calculated. But, in truth, a careful, open attitude has enabled my grandmother to put her affairs in order and feel that, when she passes away, her family will not feud of her wealth but benefit by it.

More from this Contributor

Helping Elderly Relatives for Big Inheritance Payoffs

Our $50 Wedding Anniversary

8 Ways to Raise Money for Family Vacations