Numero Uno

I was at the supermarket yesterday. As I tried to navigate the aisle, a woman ahead of me meandered in the middle of the passageway, one young child ambling on either side of her and her shopping cart. The picture should be clear - she was a traveling roadblock. The LAPD would have been proud!

I had a bad feeling about this, but continued my shopping. Imagine my chagrin when I arrived at the express checkout lane (10 items or less) to find this same woman, shopping cart filled to the brim, unloading on the express checkout line. I had 3 items.

I really wanted to say something, but kept my tongue. Instead, I went to another checkout line and then another, only to find each with another full to mostly full cart ahead of me.

Time being precious, and my blood pressure rising, I walked over to customer service, flagged the issue with a manager and was immediately escorted to another checkout which she immediately opened. The manager also called over the other people who had now backed up on other lines, also with just a few items. She was very apologetic and noted that she would talk with the young woman who was working the checkout line in question. "It's no excuse," noted the manager, "but she's new."

Upon arriving home, I learned from my wife that the checkout staff are NOT supposed to flag the "10 items or less" rule unless a customer complains. And yesterday, as is often the case, no one complained. We just continue to "suck it up!"

Well, there are issues about the rule of "10 items or less" if it's not supposed to be enforced. I wonder then, why have the rule?

But, the bigger issue is just how little so many of us care about others in our environment. It got me to thinking.

On the road, people weave in and out, make illegal turns, tailgate, don't follow signage, speed, and get lost in cell phone conversations. Their mentality seems to be, "the rules don't apply to me."

At the shopping centers around town (and elsewhere across the U.S.) its easy to notice how much effort people take to dump their shopping carts at various places in the parking lot, but that they can't walk ten extra steps to put their cart in a corral.

I watch as people throw papers and cigarettes on the ground rather than using nearby trash cans.

And recently, at our beach here in Naples, a woman was playing with her dog on the beach in full view of signage that noted, "NO DOGS ALLOWED."

There are similar "the rules don't apply to me or to my group" when it comes to religious observances in schools, reporting stories in the media, and in issues involving crimes of all kinds.

We also know from some high level folks Washington during the past year that tax and ethics rules apply to others but not to certain members of Congress of the Administration's cabinet or cabinet appointees. And we know from folks like Bernie Madoff and people in financial businesses that rules don't seem to apply to them either.

And, if one goes internationally, there are plenty of examples at the highest levels of government (Iran, is a good one) that attest to the "It doesn't apply to me" message.

Years ago, I was coming back from an overseas trip and had to move my luggage through customs. One had to pay a dollar to get a cart to handle this transit in those days. I paid and was reaching for the cart, when a woman took the cart from me. I am sorry, but chivalry vanished from my vocabulary that day. I told her the cart was mine. Her reply was that she didn't think I'd mind if she grabbed it. I told her I did mind and took the cart back.

That incident may have been the so-called "canary in the coal mine" telling me that we were headed down a slippery slope where "I come first" was going to rule.

But today, it's rampant. People everywhere don't realize that their freedom ends where someone else's begins.

And the sad part is that yesterday's experience demonstrated that this mom was setting the bar for her kids to grow up, uncaring about others. The dye seems to be cast for future generations to follow the lead of the "me generation," unless we, as a Nation, change what we do.

Right now, I'm just saddened that people can't even be courteous at the supermarket.