Nuts

Roasting his nuts on the fire
Wasn't quite what Dave had got planned
He had rolled down the blinds, pulled the curtains
Put on music, her favourite band

She turned up about seven thirty
Had their meal with dessert and some wine
Finished with cheese and some biscuits
Both of them getting on fine

From the table they moved to the sofa
From the sofa rolled onto the rug
In front of the roaring coal fire
Started to kiss and to hug

Soon, they both were quite naked
Doing what young lovers do
When a gust of wind down the chimney
Dislodged something there in the flue

A small piece of brick came a tumbling
Into the fires glowing heart
A large red hot coal then flew upwards
And hit his most delicate part

Sad to say, that the evening was ruined
Daves libido had gone right off track
He sat on a chair in the kitchen
With his testicles on an ice pack

Now the moral of this story
And I'm sure you'll say it's true
If you're going to make love by the fire
Get a sweep in to check out the flue