Oklahoma Youth Center Review From a Patient's Perspective

I was 17 years old when my world came crashing down around me. I tried to overdose and was placed in the Oklahoma Youth Center. This mental hospital for anyone under the age of 18 saved my life. I greatly appreciated everything that they did for me. I would not take back my experience for the world. The night I was admitted my middle sister, brother-in-law, and mom drove me to the hospital in Norman, Oklahoma. That was after I received an Emergency Order for Detention through the gatekeeper at Mental Health Services of Southern Oklahoma. We had to ring a bell for someone to come to the door and let us in because it was after hours.

I remember a woman coming and opening the door and asking us to have a seat in the lobby. I was scared because I didn't really know what to expect. Then my mom had to answer a lot of questions about what was going on, along with if I was allergic to anything. I was quiet the whole time. After the lady was through asking questions she said that my family could leave. I didn't hug them or say anything to them because I really didn't care what happened to me and I didn't think they really wanted me around anyway. I watched as they left the building and then the lady told me everything was going to be fine.

I then was taken through two different locked doors. They also lock one door behind you before they open a new one because they are scared you will run away or escape. When I got to the outside of the dorm I was going to stay in I met a new person. It was a young man in his mid 20s. He was very nice and tried to get me to tell them more, but I wouldn't. They had to give me an eye exam and then search me to make sure I wasn't carrying in any weapons or anything I could potentially hurt myself or anyone else with. Then they told me to do something that shocked me at first but made sense. "Take you shoe laces out," said the young man. I obliged and handed them to him and I asked when I could have them back. He said that I could as soon as I proved that I wasn't going to hurt myself.

They opened the door into the dorm and told me that I would be staying in a room with another girl, whose name I don't recall. The dorm was dark, so I really couldn't see what it was like other than there was a common area and then bedrooms off of that area. They told me that I could go to sleep and if I needed to use the bathroom I would have to come out and get someone to unlock the door. We all had bathrooms in our room, but if you are new you do not have full bathroom privileges, someone has to stand outside and wait for you. I cried myself to sleep that night, not knowing what to expect the next day.

My roommate and I awoke to the "RA", as I'll call them because I can't remember their actual title, telling us it was time to get up. I got dressed and went into the common area, which I discovered was not as bad as it seemed the night before. There were two TVs; one had a GameCube hooked up to it, soft plastic chairs to sit in front of the bigger TV. There was also a Foosball table and many tables with regular chairs around them. There was a group of 4 RAs sitting at one. I was then pulled to the side and told that I wasn't able to leave the dorm for the first few days I was going to be there.

The teens that were allowed to leave went to the cafeteria to eat breakfast and were then escorted to the school building across grounds. I and two other teens were left in the dorm to eat our breakfast out of Styrofoam containers. We all sat at the table together and they started asking me questions about why I was here. I told them what had happened and that I didn't know what to expect. They both told me that everyone that worked here was very nice and that they do help. They also asked if they took my shoe laces. I told them they had and they asked one of the RAs for the tape. They told me to tape my shoes to keep them on. When I was through eating the RA said that he wanted to talk to me some more.

I sat down at the table he was at and he could tell I was scared. He said that he had heard a little about me and that he was here to help. He said that we were going to work on coping skills for my depression and anger, which was a relief to me. We started talking about life at home and a lot became clear to him. I was a very disturbed and troubled teen. He said that I would be seeing a doctor today so they could evaluate me and make sure I wasn't sick. I met with the doctor later that day and found out that I had what I had been telling everyone for years, bipolar disorder. It was no surprise to me. I was already on the antidepressant, Zoloft, so he increased the dose and then added an antipsychotic, Remeron to help make me sleep at night.

After that I went back to the dorm and the other kids were back from school. That night I found out that you had to take a shower with someone in the room too. Talk about a lack of privacy, but they have to do it. The next few days I got to know the other teens and my roommate was released so I got a room all to myself. After a while I was allowed to go to the cafeteria to eat, which was a nice change from having semi warm food, to having hot food. The cafeteria was quaint and big enough for all dorms to eat there at the same time, but we weren't allowed to. I went to school and it was cold, but luckily it was only a short walk across the campus.

The first day I met a female teacher that was very nice. She told me that I could study to get my GED or I could do any other school work I wanted to. I decided I wanted to take English so when I went back to high school I didn't have to. It was one of the classes I liked the least. I really didn't need any credit for anything else either to graduate. We had mixed classes for the two dorms. So only half of my dorm mates were in the same class as me. The other half were from the other teen dorm. Then the gym teacher came to get my class. We had a P.E. class, which amazed me because physical education was not a requirement at my high school after you were in the 7^th grade.

We had to walk outside and around the building to go into the gym. The teacher asked one of the girls from my dorm to show me what to do. It was rather easy because you did jumping jacks, squats, jumped rope, and a few other exercises. After that you can play pool, which was one of my favorite things to do at the time. It was very fun to challenge the guys from the other dorm. Each dorm was a mixture of male and female teens and each had 12 teens. After P.E. we went to the cafeteria and ate lunch. Then it was time for group therapy. I was a little leery of this at first, but the counselor in charge was a very nice lady. After group therapy she pulled me out of class and I found out that she was my therapist. I was very comfortable talking to her because she pulled her shoes off and curled up in a chair across from you. Her point was to get you to talk and feel comfortable. She accomplished it quite easily because of her stature.

With all of the group therapy, counseling, and also just being around teens that were like me, I got the help I needed. Every day I had to tell five coping skills for my anger. I also had to answer a variety of other questions. You had to work toward making yourself better and the RAs and counselors are there to help you through the process. I owe my life to them. I still have problems with living with bipolar disorder, but it is a lifelong disease that never goes away. I was released after two months where my life was then once again in a complete uproar, but I knew how to cope with it better. If a doctor or counselor ever suggests for you or a loved one to seek help, please do. It will be worth your while in the long run. I have been off medication for almost 6 years and I am just now getting treatment again. Living with mental illness is not easy for anyone, so make it easier for you and loved ones.