Older Dogs and Euthanasia

Letting Go of Your Best Friend

Kay Baxter
I am owned by two glorious border collies that are now showing their age. Sadie was my first border collie and the dog that got me hooked on the breed. Now at the ripe old age of 14 - I know our time together is getting short.

How do I say goodbye to the dog that taught my children to love and respect animals? The dog that entertained numerous children and adults for hours with her awesome ball catching techniques. How do I say goodbye to the dog that protected my youngest son like he's her own? How do you let go of a best friend that never left your side for 14 years? She has been my constant shadow every day, every hour for so many years that I cannot even imagine my life without her in it. Even now as I write this article she lays on my feet under my desk - waiting for me to be done.

Unfortunately, there were many years that I took Sadie for granted. With the hectic life of raising children, going to soccer games and working, Sadie took a back seat. And she never complained. The kids have grown up and moved on and I know now that every day I have with Sadie is a gift.

As I watch her daily physical struggles I know our final goodbye is not far off. Regardless of the daily pills the arthritis pain is getting brutal. All those years of running at the speed of light after balls and birds has caught up with her. Many days I gently lift her up the porch or up the two back steps so that she can make it back into the house. Some days she sleeps for so long and so deep I am afraid she has left me. My heart pounds and I get a huge lump in my throat. I stroke her head and whisper her name until she finally wakes up. She opens her eyes and I breathe a huge sigh of relief. Today is not the day.

Then there is her soul mate Noah. They have been a "couple" ever since we brought Noah home as a puppy 11 years ago. They are the ultimate loving crabby married couple. Sadie rules Noah's life. She tells him when he can eat, when he can sleep, cleans his ears and just generally runs his life like any good wife would. What will happen to Noah when Sadie is gone? My fear is he will die of a broken heart and I will lose them both within a short time. I know that even more than me - he will be lost without her.

While I pray that Sadie will go quietly on her own terms, I know that rarely happens. I am determined that Sadie will go gently with the dignity and respect a best friend deserves. I have promised her that I will not prolong her life or her pain for my own selfish reasons. When the pain gets to be too much and the bad days outnumber the good; I will help her on her journey. Somehow I will find the strength to let her go and say my final goodbye.

Published by Kay Baxter

Kay Baxter owns a Miniature Horse/Shetland pony farm where she breeds, trains and shows Miniature Horses and American Shetland ponies. Kay's first book was published in 2008 titled "Miniature Horse Conformat...  View profile

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  • R. Salley10/26/2011

    sigh, you have put into words the feelings we are struggling with also. It never gets any easier, but at least they have had all the love you've given them and a beautiful life together.

  • Cherri Megasko10/19/2011

    I have two 15 -year-old miniature schnauzers struggle with multiple health issues. Your article was incredibly touching, as I am facing exactly the same thing. My greatest hope is that they will pass in their sleep, as I cannot imagine having to make that decision. But if I have to, I will. Give Sadie a hug for me.

  • Kathy10/18/2011

    Kay, this is a wonderful article. Saying 'so long for now' is never easy. I had to do this back in July and it was hard. The last paragraph of your article very eloquently summed it up and reconfirmed that I made the right decision. Thank you. Thinking of you as you go through this now.

  • Kay Baxter10/12/2011

    Thank you so much Elaina. I was in tears the whole time I wrote it.

  • Elaina Wicks10/12/2011

    So beautiful, I am choking back tears as I write. We've lost some pretty special babaies over the years and it never gets any easier. But I'm sure that you should find at least a little comfort in knowing that you gave that baby a wonderful life and that she's been loved. All the best to you...

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