On Being Childless by Choice

Perhaps working mostly alone as a freelancer I don't get the questions about having children as often as I used to when I worked in an office.
Often, once I outed myself as being married without children I could just wait for it: Why not?
Some people are kind enough not to probe (and I understand curiosity -- I'm nosy myself), but others need to know why a woman in her 30s (and now creeping closer to 40) hasn't gotten bit by the baby bug. Who can say?
Simply put, I'm just not interested in having children. It never has been a dream of mine to be a mother. I've never been one of those people who gravitates towards kids. I don't hate them, but I just have no desire to have the responsibility, to commit the time. Sometimes it's fun to visit a friend with young girls and see them enjoying playing with Barbies the way I used to do. But it's more a happiness to see kids enjoying themselves, but never a thought or desire to birth and raise my own.
My husband is pretty much on the same page as me. I think he'd make a great father, reading to a child, helping with math and science homework, taking a little one to the park to play on the swings. But it's not really our desire to have that life. Our babies are our pets.
When my mother gets asked how many grandchildren she has, she tells them four and seems to enjoy their surprise when they find out she is refers to their four-legged nature. (Though I'm sure she wouldn't mind being a grandmother, but I'm not living my life for others ... oh well.)
On one level, I don't want to think of vaccinations, back-to-school shopping, teaching table manners, going to PTA meetings and so on. On another level, I don't want the responsibility and I don't feel the obligation to contribute to and mold the next generation.
It's not a job I want, so why should I want to bring a child I don't want into this world? (And I always think, if I really wanted a child badly enough once my ovaries shrivel up to dust, then I can always adopt. But I don't even see that happening one day.)
Some people ask: Don't you want a child to care for you when you're older? Sure it sounds nice to think you'll have someone to watch over you when you're old and need help getting around, but I don't think that's a good enough reason to have a child.
That's not pure love to me. It sounds cruel, a selfish insurance, in fact, to grow your own caretaker.
Though I'm sure most people who are having children aren't thinking, "when I'm 80, they'll watch out for me." At least I hope not.
And some would say I'm probably selfish or lazy. I'd say yes to both. I'd add realistic, too, since I know what I do or don't want to do.
I really loathe the argument that it'd be a waste not to have children when you can. I feel for women who have tried to conceive and can't, and I wish I could there could be a switch, but it's not to be. To me, it's more a waste to have something you never wanted or needed. I don't want to invest the time or the energy that it would take. And I know having a child would take a lot.
I think there's something ingrained in our culture that pushes us to marry and procreate. When I got to know the quiet guy at the office better and we started dating, I was more than willing to marry -- and haven't regretted the last seven years for a second. I haven't regretted choosing to be childless, either.