On Love and Marriage

Many things have been said about these two concepts - some good, some bad. The fact is that they most of the time they go together and paradoxically, sometimes they do not end together.

Love is complex. Is the most beautiful feeling a person can experiment, but at the same time it provides a mixture of other feelings too. Sometimes we don't know the meaning of jealousy until we fall in love, or the meaning of forgiveness until we come to a situation that our loved one needs to be forgiven. Yes, loves comes with a whole package of feelings and emotions that makes us think that the world is wonderful and life is beautiful. And then... the reality. Love also comes with responsibilities, commitments and sacrifices, which at times may not be so pleasant.

When we first fall in love, our lives are turned up side down and we only want to be with the person responsible for that feeling. When time passes, these first emotions and excitement get quieter and gradually turn into a more mature love. This is the love that will lead to marriage.

Mature love, some may think, is a bit less fun. It is more of being responsible, planning the future together, being able to make decisions that will change the lives of both. This love means that sacrifices would need to be done, because even if we loved our partner with all our heart, he or she is an individual with his or her own ideas and ways of thinking and acting. So here it comes... the moment of truth... Will I be able to live with this person the rest of my life knowing all the positive and negative qualities he or she has? Am I willing to give up or modify some things in order to make the relationship work? Very important questions to ask, and sometimes we are afraid to look inside for the answers. But, if the answers to those questions are yes, then the next step, in most of the cases, is marriage.

And marriage is a HUGE step! It means that you are committing to share your life with another person - not only a house or a bank account, but your whole life, your friends, your family, your secrets, your anecdotes, your good mood and even your bad mood. You decide that from now on you will be a society in which each of you will take active part in the contribution to the growth of your family, not as individuals but as a unit. And love plays a very important role here. Love is the only ingredient that makes couples stay together in the good times and in the bad times. Love is the only responsible for the desire we have inside to see our partner happy and to make every effort in order to achieve this. Love is the engine of marriage and without it, it simply does not work.

But don't think that everything is a path full of rose petals, because marriage has its great moments, but also the bad ones. Moments when you love your partner to bits and moments when you ask yourself why you married that person. Moments that you wished they lasted forever and moments that are so bitter or sad that you wished you just disappeared. That is marriage, but the best thing it has is that you share all those experiences with the person you love most and if he or she loves you the same way, you will both survive (and your marriage of course!).