One Man's Fashion Disaster on a Date

I have never been one to be extremely concerned with fashion and style. For those that know me well, they can attest to the fact that I am as happy in an old worn pair of jeans just as much as I am happy in a traditionally conservative suit. For me, fashion is not as important as being neat, clean, comfortable and presentable for the occasion. However, I learned the hard way several years ago that whenever you are going to go on a date you should plan your wardrobe accordingly and well in advance. Planning is the key, but I somehow failed to do it and my date night became a disaster.

It was December 31, 1988. I was eagerly looking forward to a great night out on the town. Days earlier, I had placed my black trousers in my local dry cleaning store. New Year's Eve fell on a Saturday evening, but for some odd reason, I did not make it to the cleaners until an hour after they closed that evening. The store had decided to end business a view hours earlier due to the upcoming holiday. After knocking on the window and begging for my black pants, I was kindly told that they were not available. I immediately begin to panic. The local clothing stores in town were closed and being a broke college student, there just was not much that I could afford to do at my level and at that time. I returned to my apartment and started digging through my chest and looking through the closet. Eventually, I came up with the idea to just wear an old navy blue pair of slacks instead. I figured the two colors were not that different at all and maybe I could get away with it on just this one occasion. Needless to say, navy blue slacks do not match with a black dinner jacket no matter how hard you try.

I must admit, I got a few strange looks as I went to pick up my date for the evening. This was the single instance that I needed her to be exactly on time and ready to go. Naturally, that was not the case with my date. In fact, it seemed as if she took an extra hour to get ready after I arrived. The wait at her residence would not have been such a fiasco, but all of her family members, including her grandmother, were present. Adding to my fashion woes was the fact that the old blue slacks were a bit tight at the time. I obviously had been packing on the college pounds and the pants offered no wiggle room. The pants were really beginning to become uncomfortable the longer I remained in them. I tried to act as if everything was fine but the truth of the matter was the evening just was not going very well. Finally, after sitting for what seemed to be an eternity I had the opportunity to leave. In getting up from the sofa, I somehow managed to split my pants. The seam in the back had given way and the underwear were making their presence known. This was not the way the evening was supposed to go and the embarrassment was immeasurable!

In short, I decided to end my New Year's Eve night out and headed home. Fortunately for me, my date that evening did not hold the fashion disaster against me. We married four years later, but she always checks the color of my pants before we venture out.