One Mother's Vain Attempt to Rid Her Child of His Pacifier!

When I had my first child I thought the pacifier was the greatest thing made on earth. It meant sleeping through the night, less headaches, and a much quieter baby. It was my dream come true. I beautiful peaceful baby sleeping so quietly and sucking oh so gently on his little plug. Now my child is near fifteen months old. I figure he is old enough to not need a plug anymore, right? Okay well at least it is time to stop using it quite so much, but now that I am attempting to cut down on using the plug it is quickly becoming my worst nightmare!

This little plug constantly plagues me. I have had dreams of a grown man getting up in the morning and popping a nuk into his mouth on his way into work. I try to picture it as a nervous habit, like of smoking a cigarette or chewing gum but then I think of how difficult it is for smokers to quite smoking and then I think to myself, "what if he can't ever live without it?" I then go on to picture him walking down the street on his way to work sucking on a giant pacifier made for men 30 years and older. They come in a variety of colors and choices and different tastes and textures. Oh my, I think to myself, I can't let my little baby continue, it is just too much. He already has too many pictures taken of him with this annoying little thing covering up his most adorable smile. This was when I decided I should seek outside assistance and consult some professionals called moms.

I sought advice from friends and coworkers and from there my dreams only worsened. I had a friend whose child would find the pacifiers she had hidden and then hide them on her! Now I am envisioning my son playing hide and go seek games with this nasty little nuk. I start thinking to myself, I am too old to be searching for this spiteful little thing. I can pictures it now, me, one hundred years old hobbling around using my walker and taking at least five minutes to search for the plug under the sofa which much to my dismay I will never find because I am the worst at hide and seek. There must be a better way!

I still haven't broken the wicked little habit but I will continue to work on it. My new goal is two years old and I intend to keep it since the dentists keep telling me to do it or else he'll have to have braces. I know he'll thank me eventually for going through these trials and tribulations and I intend to remind him of the pain staking days that I had to endure just to break him. It is just one of those wonderful thinks about being a mom.