One Night Stand Etiquette: A Woman's Guidelines for the Morning After

Chances are, you've been in this situation. Or, if you're too goody-goody to admit it, you've had a "friend" who was in the same situation. It's nothing to be ashamed of, either way. It's not something you want to share at the Thanksgiving dinner table with all your relatives either, but at one point or another, the majority of us have had a one-night stand. Whether it be a drunken blur from a fraternity party or a flirtation from across the bar that went a bit too far, and you wake up to find yourself next to a guy that looked a lot more like Leonardo DiCaprio ten shots ago, you find yourself in the ultimate of awkward situations. Don't lose your cool, whatever you do, and just follow the following set of guidelines which will help you get through this moment.

10) Don't give him the whole "I've never done this before" routine. That will just make him more likely to think of this as a repeat occurrence for you. You don't need to prove yourself to anyone. You know in your heart whether or not this is in your nature, and it can be your little secret. No one needs to know how many strangers you've gone home with on multiple occasions. You should feel free to forget that number too, if you like. And if the guy asks you if you've done this before, simply say, "It's not normally my nature," give him a smile, and change the subject. Enough said.

9) Don't overstay your welcome. You wake up, look at the clock, and you should already be glancing around the room, eyeing your belongings. Don't wait around in bed, especially after he gets up. Don't hang out while he takes a shower either. When the guy leaves the room to take his shower, he secretly is hoping that you will leave during that period of time. Unless he specifically indicates that he would like you to stick around, don't assume. Another indicator of him wanting you to stay would be if he actually invited you to shower with him. I still say you should leave, even when offered the invite. You don't want to seem too clingy or eager. Plus, that shower could be just another testosterone-filled excuse so he can score an extra morning session before he starts his day.

8) Don't attempt to engage him in conversation. Not all guys are morning people, and having a conversation with a stranger you just woke up next to can be one of the strangest and most uncomfortable experiences. If you find that he's answering you in mono-syllables, that's your indicator right there that he just doesn't want to talk. And if you feel that you just must chat with him, don't mention the hook-up, the future, or anything touchy in that aspect. You'll only make him that much more eager to have you leave.

7) Don't offer to leave your number or ask him to call you. When men want something, they will get it themselves. If he has any intention of calling you, he will ask that you write down your number before you leave. Obviously if you say to him, "Do you want my number?" he's going to feel bad if he says no, so any male would feel the safer choice would be to have you write down your digits, and then they just go straight into the trashcan. And you will be waiting by the phone for a call that will never come!

6) If possible, try to leave before he wakes up. It will make you that much more mysterious. And if he really likes you, he'll attempt to find you. He'll ask around, maybe go again to the same fraternity house or bar that you met at, and he'll look for you. Guys will go to great lengths for a girl they really view as worth the effort.

5) If he does invite you for breakfast or to hang out, even if you really want to, thank him but turn down the offer. If he has any real interest in you, he will try to set up a future date with you. Besides, do you really want to sit across from the table from him in broad daylight with last night's makeup still caked on?

4) If you don't remember his name, don't ask him what it is. That will look very bad on your part. See if he remembers yours first. That's a true indicator as to how much interest he really has in you.

3) If you happen to wake up in his frat house and find yourself heading down the "Walk of Shame", don't act embarassed or ashamed. Simply roll your eyes, act like you couldn't care less, and walk out with your head straight up in the air. You have nothing to be ashamed about.

2) Don't ask him "how you were" last night. Chances are, he probably doesn't remember. And if he does, he will say something about it.

1) Don't get on your cell phone while you get dressed in front of him and tell your sorority sister that you're "in some random guy's room and can't remember how crazy last night was." Save the gossip for when you have left and are well under way.

Follow the list of guidelines and you'll ease out of any sticky one-night stand situation with finesse!!