'Oprah' Recap: Iyanla Clears the Air with Oprah

In the late '90s, "Oprah" shifted focus to include a group of experts who helped viewers change their lives in various aspects. Audiences loved it and, with Oprah's help, those gurus--including Suze Orman, Dr. Phil and Dr. Oz--went on to host their own successful TV shows. But the spiritual expert, Iyanla, simply disappeared from Lady O's realm. After eleven years, the two reunite on "Oprah" to discuss their falling out.

Iyanla Leaves Harpo
During the height of her career in 1999, Iyanla received a handwritten letter of praise from a powerful TV executive and called to thank her. The phone call led to a dinner invitation and meeting with Barbara Walters, who offered her a TV show.

Knowing that Harpo intended to create a show for her, she declined the offer. However, it weighed on her mind. She met with Oprah and an executive producer to tell them she had an offer from "somebody big" and believed God told her this was the anointed time, not the appointed time. Two weeks later, a Harpo attorney called and told her to take the deal. That was the end of Iyanla and Oprah.

Oprah was grooming Iyanla for her own show. She usually sat in the audience, giving the stage to Iyanla during her Tuesday appearances. She took the meeting as an ultimatum that Iyanla wanted her own show now or she was leaving. At the same time, she thought Iyanla had an amazing offer and did not want to interfere with divine guidance.

During their rift, Iyanla's daughter died from cancer, her husband divorced her, and she lost her house and book deal. Her talk show was not at all what she expected and ended after only one season. She wrote to Oprah several times over the years, but there was no reply until recently.

She Said, She Said
Oprah says Iyanla was not ready for her own show at that moment, but they were working towards that goal. Iyanla agrees and asks why no one told her she was not ready. Oprah says they did, but Iyanla denies it.

The two maintain this attitude for much of the interview. Although Iyanla apologizes, she blames ignorance of the industry while maintaining her innocence. Iyanla says she did not realize the gift Oprah was giving and did not know how to receive it. She suggests Oprah's own business savvy and slight jadedness colored her interpretation of the meeting all those years ago. Oprah disagrees.

It feels very similar to Fantasia Barrino's interview with Oprah where she talks about secretly being too ill to perform in "The Color Purple." The push and pull of "Why didn't you tell me?" versus "I thought you knew!" is powerful. Both women also fault others for trying to exploit their gifts and say old feelings of ugliness and unworthiness led to poor choices.

Peace from Broken Pieces
Iyanla's new book, "Peace from Broken Pieces," provides a more in-depth version of events. Whatever happened, Oprah contends that she was never angry and the apology is unnecessary because she forgave her long ago. It is clear that both women felt wounded.

Iyanla returns to the show next Wednesday.

Sources
Morris W. O'Kelly, "Iyanla Vanzant: From Brink of Suicide to Peace of Mind", Huffington Post
"Fantasia's Reality Check", Oprah