Organizing a Giant Mess

Most people fall somewhere along a spectrum of organizational skills and abilities. The spectrum ranges from a level of disorganized chaotic anarchy penetrating every square centimeter of your life to being hopelessly devoted to organizing as a form of religious enlightenment. In other words: complete mess in every way versus overbearing control freak...to put it bluntly.

I have to confess that I tend to lean more toward the overbearing control freak end of the spectrum. I'm a rare breed that actually finds pleasure in untangling a giant mess of kite string or the huge ball of Christmas lights. Laundry day is always fun when it's time to do the socks. I say I don't enjoy finding the pairs and putting them together but in all truth, I get a quiet satisfaction when I get to the end and find that each sock had a match and they are all properly paired with their life twins.

Now, my mother-in-law is at the opposite end of that spectrum from where I call home. I think she is the poster child for disorganized chaotic anarchy penetrating every square centimeter of life. Personally, I believe that your organizational ability or lack thereof is in direct proportion to how you feel on the inside. That's another story for another day of course but my lovely mom-in-law fits that bill to a T. Her home was a mess, her emotions were a mess, her work (when she had it) was a mess, her family was a mess, and her relationships (when she had them) were a mess. Even her messes were a mess.

One day, her mess pile all came raining down on her and who was called in to head the clean-up crew but the overbearing control freak herself...me. She was ill in every way and needed to be moved from her two-bedroom apartment of 15 years to a studio apartment in an assisted living facility. Not a small task to say the least. But I put my rubber gloves and project manager hat and hazmat suite on and concocted the master plan to get everything sorted, packed, moved, cleaned, and unpacked while doing my best to avoid the need for toe tags.

Here is a picture of what I was up against. Fifteen years in the same apartment. Curtains were never opened. She had smoked a pack of cigarettes a day in there for the entirety of her inhabitance. The walls were literally dripping with nicotine and dirt. The carpet had not been cleaned or vacuumed for at least five years. One of the two bedrooms was stacked to the ceiling with bags of garbage, dirty clothes, and miscellaneous junk. Dirty dishes were everywhere including stacked not so neatly in the cupboards where you would usually expect to find them clean. There was a fifty-five gallon fresh water fish tank that had not been cleaned or emptied of its deceased residents for who knows how long. There were things in that apartment that probably should have been submitted to a research lab for evaluation and safe disposal.

How did I do it? Tarps. I started with three tarps where I sorted garbage from possibly salvageable items for donation from the bare necessities that could be cleaned up and moved to her new home. We started in the closest room and worked our way through the house until we got everything out and piled on the tarps. Next, dump runs. It took four of those before the garbage was cleaned out. Then two trips to the nearest donation center. Finally we were left with what needed to be cleaned and scrubbed and sprayed for foreign life forms.

Once everything was washed and rewashed and washed yet again, they were put into plastic bins and containers to stack neatly in her new oversized closet. Matching plastic bins in various sizes were my best friend. Nametag stickers labeling each container made for efficient sorting and allow you to easily find your items later. Having a large quantity of clothes can be overwhelming by itself but sorting your hanging items according to types of clothing such as shirts, pants, dresses, and skirts and then by color makes a much less stressful and more manageable closet environment.

In the end, everything was safely disposed of, cleaned, moved into her new home, and organized for easy access from her motorized scooter. I'm happy to report that there were no incidents of bacterial infection, disease, nor a need for any toe tags. All in all, it was a smashing success.