Overcoming Infertility: One Couple's Journey to Parenthood

For some couples, it seems like it takes no effort for them to conceive. They can just look at each other and nine months later deliver a bundle of joy! My husband and I do not belong to this category of lucky people. It took seven years, twelve thousand dollars, and a team of doctors, nurses, and lab techs to conceive our first child! Here's our story.

Scott and I were both quite young when we married in 1992. He was twenty-two years old and I was twenty. During the first few years of our marriage, the concept of infertility never crossed our minds. In fact, I was really afraid of getting pregnant at the time. We had low paying jobs, no health insurance, and were both working on our college degrees. I faithfully swallowed a birth control pill daily.

By 1996, our circumstances had changed. We both had decent jobs and health insurance coverage. We decided it was time to have a baby! I quit taking the birth control pills. We were so excited! Every little aspect of our lives began to revolve around what we would do once the baby arrived. We had no doubt that it would only take a few months to conceive.

Two years passed. Two years of monthly disappointments. Two years of watching what I ate or drank in the weeks leading up to my period, just incase I might be pregnant. I went into complete denial. Nothing is wrong, I thought. We're just not trying hard enough! I didn't want to believe that it was something that was completely out of my control; I didn't want to admit that we needed help to conceive a baby. I was embarrassed. We had told our family, friends, and neighbors that we were trying to have a baby. We were letting everyone down!

In 1999, both my sister and my sister-in-law became pregnant. My husband and I were happy for them. It was really hard on us, though. I cried in private....a lot. Scott had his moments too. I felt ashamed of my feelings and the conflicting thoughts that were invading my mind. On one hand, I was happy to become an aunt. Two precious babies were coming into the world! On the other hand, I felt it wasn't fair. My sister-in-law had only been trying to conceive for a few months. It had only taken my sister a month to get pregnant. What was wrong with us? I began to wallow in self pity and doubt. I would never become a parent. My husband felt a bit like I did, although he never once truly doubted that we would become parents. His positive attitude finally won me over. So did the sweet little niece and nephew who arrived that year. Seeing them made me even more determined to have a baby of my own. I decided to swallow my pride and start seeking help. Scott was in total agreement.

In 2000, my gynecologist prescribed clomid for me. It's a fertility drug that stimulates ovulation. It didn't work for us. I was still unable to get pregnant. My gynecologist then referred me to a fertility specialist.

The fertility specialist checked us out from head to toe. My husband had the relatively easy tests. He was given a physical. He then did blood work and had his semen analyzed. All was well. There seemed to be no problem on his end; no simple explanation for our years of infertility.

My tests were not all so easy! I started out with simple blood work. Nothing abnormal was detected, so I moved on to the hysterosalpinogram. This test checks to see if the fallopian tubes are open and shaped correctly. It also allows the physician to evaluate the size, shape, and structure of the uterine cavity. It was quite an uncomfortable test! A catheter was inserted and a dye was injected through my cervix and into my uterus and fallopian tubes. X-ray equipment monitored the movement of the dye. A nurse held my hand when she noticed I was experiencing some painful cramping. I tried to concentrate on the screen that displayed the x-ray. Everything was normal. No explanation for our fertility issues.

I underwent a laparoscopy next. It is an outpatient surgical procedure where a thin telescope-like instrument is inserted just beneath the naval to check for abnormalities. They found a few fibroid cysts and burned them out with a laser. It took about two weeks to recover completely from this. It probably would not have taken so long if those fibroids had not been there! We were hopeful at the time that the removal of the fibroid cysts would help to remove a possible barrier to our being able to conceive. After several tries, though, I was still unable to get pregnant.

It was now 2001. We let our visits to the fertility specialist slide. We were losing hope again. There seemed to be no reasonable explanation as to why we couldn't have children.

In 2002, we decided to try again. Our fertility specialist suggested intrauterine insemination (IUI). In this procedure, sperm is injected directly into the uterus through a thin, flexible catheter. We underwent three IUI procedures. None were successful. Our doctor suggested in vitro fertilization. I was a little scared. I thought about the cost, the discomfort involved, and the risk of it not working. Scott was all for it! In the end, he (with a little help from my mom) convinced me that we should do it.

In December of 2002, we started our in vitro class. We learned about the procedure and met others who were about to undergo the same things we were! I was optimistic, but skeptical. I wanted so much for this procedure to work, but didn't want to get my hopes dashed like they had been so many times before.

The in vitro regimen started out quite simple. I had to take birth control pills (slightly ironic). Then came the variety of fertility drugs to stimulate my egg production. My husband was a very supportive spouse and became my "shot" man. He gently administered all the shots that were required. These were uncomfortable, but would have been even more so if I had had to give them to myself!

Finally, my (19!) eggs were ready to be retrieved. They put me out for the procedure, so I really don't remember a thing about it!

We waited nervously for a few days after the egg retrieval for news of how the eggs had fertilized. Out of 19 eggs, only 3 were viable pre-embryos. We went back in to the hospital for the procedure to transplant the pre-embryos into my uterus. I was so nervous. Any wrong move on my part would demolish all the weeks of preparation for this moment. I held as still as a statue as they transferred the precious pre-embryos into my uterus.

We had to wait about two weeks after the procedure to find out if we were pregnant. I remember my husband and me standing in the bathroom looking down at the POSITIVE result on the over-the-counter pregnancy test! We couldn't believe our eyes! After all those years of minus signs, we finally got a plus sign! I was still a bit jaded, though. It might be the fertility drugs affecting the test result. I just couldn't let myself get too excited until I took the official pregnancy test at the clinic. I took it the next day. It was a blood test, so they were unable to give me the results right away. They had to call us the next day.

The phone call from the in vitro nurse was brief but it was absolutely the best phone call of my entire life! I was pregnant!

In October 2003, I delivered a healthy baby girl. My husband and I were ecstatic! Our long and sometimes arduous journey to parenthood was over. We were no longer just a couple. We were a family!