Pain in Finding Happiness: The Enlightenment

Through adversity Christy has learned many lessons; lessons on love, life, and self worth among others. The pain that she had to endure in order to simply be OK in her own skin was immense; ironically, the inevitable happiness Christy was seeking relied on her suffering.

There was that part of Christy that wanted things to just seem normal again but she knew that she couldn't give in to it. The truth was that she had no idea what normal was aside from being just a setting on her washing machine.

Frank and Christy both knew that they couldn't be together any longer, no matter how bad it hurt or how much they missed each other. When Frank got out of jail he didn't even want to go back to their home, he really was not sure what he wanted but knew it had nothing to do with his marriage. Frank had been silently suffering his own set of issues for some time and was unwilling to let anyone in.

Christy needed very little in life, yet it was much more then frank would give. She needed an equal partner with which to share her life, someone who could love the real her and allow her to remove the social mask she had put on years ago. Christy either needed someone who was real with her on every level or no one at all. She didn't want to love someone who was hiding from her much less from himself.

The most important things in Christy's life were honesty, security, and at least a small amount of tenderness. She was in no way going to compromise what was left of her dignity staying in another hurtful marriage.

It was easier for Christy to accept the end of the relationship knowing that frank too had given up. In the end they parted civilly and harbored no resentment towards each other.

Frank moved to Oregon and Christy went back to school, both of them seemed to be moving on with their lives. Christy learned that being alone was not scary after all and that she could begin to love herself again. Christy carried on balancing her house, children, and education as well as the search for her true self and she really was OK.

One of the most powerful statements that had been made to Christy during this transition period was that she needed to just sit on her bed and be alone with God, that became the advice that would carry her through much adversity from that day forward and she very much enjoyed the time she had alone with God.

Christy finally learned that finding happiness was an impossible task, she had to create her own happiness by living life on life's terms. The enlightenment she was receiving was a powerful thing and she embraced each lesson as something that helped her to grow and blossom each day.