Parenting the Sexually Abused Child

Has your child been sexually abused? Are you unsure on what you can do to help you child recovery from sexual abuse? To help understand what are some common challenges parents have when parenting their sexually abused child and for tips on parenting a sexually abused child, I have interviewed therapist Eric Cassius LPC, MHSP, CHt.

Tell me a little bit about yourself.

"I am a Licensed Professional Counselor, Mental Health Service Provider, and Clinical Hypnotherapist. I have a private practice in Memphis, TN and have been practicing for 15 years. I work with adults and children using cognitive behavioral techniques and hypnosis to help our clients with a wide variety of issues. One of my specialties is treating children and adolescents with behavioral problems. For the past 10 years I have been a referral source for the Juvenile Courts and the Department of Children Services in Memphis, TN for children who have been accused of sexual assault or have been victims of sexual abuse."

What are some challenges a parent may have when it comes to parenting a sexually abused child?

"There are many challenges a parent may have when it comes to parenting a sexually abused child. First is the guilt the parent may have for not being able to protect the child from the perpetrator. In this day and age with most parents both working it is almost impossible to be able to be around your child 24/7. Children are in day cares or with people the parents trust and even in these situations a parent can't control all the circumstances. I usually emphasize to the parent of a child who has been victimized that they protected their child as best they could. A perpetrator can be anyone and in many situations it is a person you thought you could trust.

Victimized children will go through many different stages of recovery. Depending on the severity of the abuse and the circumstances every child may react differently. Diagnostically we are dealing with a type of post-traumatic stress disorder. It can be chronic in nature and be long term or acute and be short term. The child has suffered severely in these situations and I explain to the parents that their innocents have been murdered and the child is now aware of how the reproductive organs work. In many cases the child is no longer interested in playing with Barbie dolls or Hot Wheels, they are now preoccupied with sex and/or the hurt they have encountered. Many of these children act out sexually and will even perpetrate abuse against other children. The child may have nightmares of the event, become isolated, act oppositional, and be hypersensitive. The child may not show any signs of trauma in the beginning yet may start acting out later as they get older and realize what has happened to them."

What are some tips for parenting the sexually abused child?

"The parent of a sexually abused child must not blame themselves or be perceived to be blaming the child. It is important that if your child begins to act out that you try to keep in mind that the victimized child needs to know they have a nurturing parent who loves them and will protect them and get them the help they need. The child is dealing with more than they were ready to deal with and need to know their parent loves them and can explain and demonstrate to the child what is appropriate behavior."

What type of professional help is available for a parent that is parent a sexually abused child?

"Parents need to know there is help for their children. This is not a time to keep secrets and pretend it didn't happen. This is a time to act and find a child psychologist, counselor or social worker that specializes in treating traumatized children. A parent can start with their pediatrician or ask for a referral from community mental health agencies. The sooner the child gets into therapy the better the prognosis."

Thank you Eric for doing the interview on parenting the sexually abused child. For more information on Eric Cassius or his work you can check out his website at CassiusandAssociates.com.

Recommended Readings: http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/5796524/how_to_stop_being_a_victim_of_verbal.html?cat=5">How to Stop Being a Victim of Verbal Abuse

http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/5723160/how_to_forgive_an_abusive_parent.html?cat=5">How to Forgive An Abusive Parent

http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/5697982/how_to_overcome_the_memories_of_childhood.html?cat=25">How to Overcome Memories of Childhood Sexual Abuse