Parenting Styles and You

In managing children's behavior researchers refer to the different strategies parents use as parenting styles. Developmentalist Diana Baumrind focused on four aspects of family functioning.

1. Warmth or nurturance
2. Clarity and consistency of rules
3. Level of expectations or maturity demands
4. Communication between parent and child

Each of these on there is related to various child behaviors. From this conceptualization she came up with the idea that there are three parenting styles.

Permissive- high in nurturance but low in maturity demands control, and communication with the child

Authoritarian - high in control and maturity demands but low in nurturance and communication

Authoritative- is high in all four dimensions warmth, clarity level, and communication

Develop mentalists Eleanor Maccoby and John Martin put a variation on Baumrind's system. They believe that there are only two dimensions instead of four, which are; the degree of demand or control and the amount of acceptance versus rejection. The intersection of the these types however creates a system like Baumrinds parenting styles with the addition of the uninvolved parent style.

Macoby and Martin category system

Authoritarian Type: Asserts physical, social and emotional control over the child to gain compliance from the child

Permissive Type: Lets the child have free reign. They can do what they want. If the child refuses to go to bed when told the parent will let her go whenever she wants too.

Authoritative Type: Parents using this style set clear limits but also respond to the individual Child's needs. They firmly stick to their demands without having to assert their power over the child.

Uninvolved Type: Parents who use this style are totally Indifferent to the child's behavior and to the responsibilities of parenting. They would never set a bedtime or rule or even bother to tell them to go to bed.

In reading this different parenting styles I would have to say my parents were the Authoritative type. I was never spanked when I did something wrong I would be yelled at and I would feel bad I disappointed them and that is what led me to not defy them. I think when I have a child I will mostly be of the Authoritative type but a lot of times I have seen that it depends on the child on what options you have that will work to get them to behave. I can see myself possibly spanking the child if that is what they need which could possibly be considered a bit authoritarian. Except for the uninvolved type, I think depending on the situation and the behavior the child is portraying a parent might move through the different levels of parenting styles just as we do through the different sleep stages.

Another thought about parenting styles is do we use it in our everyday lives in non parent roles? For me I find that my parenting style affects other aspects of my life and career. If you have ever taught a class or worked with a fellow co-workers on a project/team you may find that you work with others in the same style you use with your children or the style your parents used with you.

References:

Boyd, Denise, and Helen Bee. Lifespan Development (5th Edition) (MyDevelopmentLab Series). 5th ed. Boston: Allyn & Bacon, 2008.