Parenting Tips on Communicating Effectively with Your Child

Communication is the crucial key to harmony and understanding between family members. As a parent it is important that you should speak the language of your child. It is not enough that you "talk" to him. It is also vital that you "listen" and understand him.

Communication should be a language the sender and the encoder both understand; that there are no barriers between the two. Here are some useful pointers on how to communicate effectively with your child:

1. When you talk to him, face each other.

It is difficult to talk to someone who is not paying attention to what you are saying. This goes true also when your child wants to talk to you. Sit down and look at each other. Observe your child's body language, this would tell you more about what he is saying.
A face to face encounter will make you determine whether your child is telling the truth or not. It will also reveal hidden feelings the child has; if he shrugs his shoulders that means he is not sure, etc.

2. Choose an appropriate venue.

Talk in a place where you can hear each other. Inside his room would be good. Turn off anything that could distract you both, like radio, TV, iPods, cell phones, etc.
If you are outside, choose a place where the noise is minimal. You don't want to be shouting lest you'll be misunderstood.

3. Use a language that you both understand.

Don't talk "above" him. Use the lingo that you use at home. Avoid cursing and swearing. This would cause animosity and defensiveness in the part of your child.

4. Don't interrupt him.

Interrupting your child while he is speaking is counter-productive. You are demonstrating to him disrespect and you are drastically stopping the flow of his thoughts. If he is very young, this can be a traumatic experience.

5. Ask leading questions to understand more.

Asking additional questions would make you understand him more. "Why did you do it?" "What happened next?" "How did you feel?" etc. This would help you see all of the angles of the story. View things through his eyes to understand him more.

6. Be positive.

State things positively. This would encourage him to open up more because he knows that you would accept it positively. Being positive about things would definitely bring good rapport to a communication process.

These useful tips would be useless if they are not coupled with love. You can never go wrong if you talk to your child with love and concern. Remember, when your child is certain of your love, he will always speak his mind, no matter what.