Parenting Tips: How to Deal with Bullies

As the mother of eight, I've experienced quite a few different things, however, my first 6 kids consist of girls. Lots of dolls, hair, nails, and sleepovers with screeching laughter keeping me up until the wee hours of the morning. After the birth of my 2 last kids, that happen to be boys, all that has changed! Now there's nudging, rough housing and wrestling. Included in that picture has come some bullying. Now, I've had to become more savvy about how to deal with bullies. Here's some of the tips from other moms that I've gotten some much needed help from.

Avoid the Bullies

I've told my son to do his best to keep some distance between himself and those he knows that have these bully type tendencies. I found it helpful to tell him to keep watch over where these bullies are on the playground so he can promptly move himself to areas that aren't occupied by them. This will help to prevent any problems before they start.

Show No Reaction

Another piece of advice I've found instrumental in helping my son is to let him know that even though he is doing his best to avoid the bullies, he may find himself confronted with a problem anyway. In that case I've made it clear that he should not show any reaction that lets the bully know he's afraid of him. Instead, walk away and move on to playing or talking with another child that's not involved. I think it's important for your child to know that they need to show no reaction so that the bully's power is diffused.

Stay in a Group

Generally, bullies don't want to do their bullying in a group situation. They know that this poses a threat to their attempts to be powerful due to possible backlash from some of those in the group. I've told my son to stay surrounded with as many people as he can when he's at recess or in the classroom to further avoid a bully's attempt to intimidate him.

Change Schools

This may sound extreme, but I guess it depends on how difficult the bullying has become. I'm aware of a family in my own community that needed to resort to a school change just because the problem did not seem to resolve, and the school officials don't take things as seriously as they should. As a parent, it's our call to keep our kids in a safe environment and if the situation has become so difficult that your child has been negatively affected in a significant way, you may want to seriously consider resorting to this option.

Dealing with bullies isn't something we want for our kids, however, it does become part of reality for many of us. Hopefully some of these tips can give you some insight in more positively directing the situation.