Parenting Toddlers when You Have a Chronic Illness

Parenting a toddler takes a lot of time, energy, patience and love and raising children is a hard but rewarding job. In the best of circumstances, parenting can be trying and even the best of us will make mistakes along the way. Raising a family when you have a chronic illness takes some creativity at times but the child or children can still have a memorable, rewarding childhood that is filled with love.

One common mistake that is made by chronically ill parents is they feel guilty about their illness or illnesses and worry continuously about the affect their illness is having on their children. Children are very observant and they may pick up on your guilt and somehow blame themselves for your illness. Worry only makes the illness worse and uses up energy. It is important to realize that even though you are sick, you can still show your children love and attention.

Depending on when you became ill can determine how much of an adjustment it will be for your children. My son has only known me chronically ill, so to him our life is normal.

Here are some helpful tips that I have learned along the way through my own life experiences with chronic illness and parenting a toddler.

It's not always what you do with your child, it's spending quality time with them that counts. Young children like to be kept physically entertained, but if you have a chronic illness this may be impossible to do on a regular basis. At what time of day are you at your best physically? If it is the morning, then use this time to do some physical activity with your child.

Find activities to have on hand that you can do together if you are lying in bed, sitting on the couch, or sitting on the floor. If you are having a bad day and physically are not able to do much, work on a small puzzle, read a book, color, play cards, or work on activity books and flash cards.

If your illness keeps you in bed a lot of the time, have an activity center or create a play area in your bedroom where your toddler can play.

At times, chronic illness can make it difficult to even read to our children. For these instances, have on hand audio books to entertain your child.

Children's DVDs can be a lifesaver if you are too sick to do anything. You can sit or lay and snuggle with your child while watching their favorite movie.

If you have more than one child, have them help out with the younger ones. As part of their chores, have them read the toddler a bedtime story, help them put on their pajamas, give them a bath and play with them.

Let your toddler help with some of the easier household chores by making a game out of it. Every little bit of help you can get when you are chronically ill counts and when you teach your children right, it is amazing how useful they can be at such a young age! My son has helped me sort laundry and put dishes away since he was 3 years old. He is very competitive, so we have races to see who gets done first. Naturally, he always wins since I can't move that fast!

Have a babysitter lined up who you can call when you are having a really bad day and are unable to function. Also keep a babysitter who you can have come to your house once or twice a week to entertain your child (if he/she is an only child). A young babysitter can help use up some of that energy that is so abundant in toddlers and it gives you a well-deserved break.

If you can afford it, hire someone to help out with the housework. If you are sick and trying to do all of the housework, laundry and errands, what do you have leftover to give your children? I have always been very picky about my house but I have learned to relax some on cleaning. Our house is kept neat, but if I am having a low energy day, I save that for my son and the cleaning waits.

As mothers, we want to protect our children and we never want them to feel hurt. Because of this we try to hide how we are feeling and put on smiles and try to pretend that everything is okay with us even when it's not. I feel we can take this too far when we are sick though and it can have even further devastating effects on your health if you try to pretend that you are healthy when you are not. It's okay to be who you are and your children will be okay.

If nothing else, they will learn how to be compassionate, understanding and caring as adults towards others.