Parents' Day in Thailand

Our school had its parents' day today. I always find these types of events to be a bit of a trial; especially as it involves so much lying on my behalf. My school insists that every student get at least 70% in every subject and a saving-face culture doesn't make it easy for teachers to say anything too negative to the parents; any problems need to be indirectly and lightly brought to their attention and given a positive spin. My Thai is not really good enough for this type of meanings within meanings stuff. Mind you, the benefit of having less than fluent Thai is that parents are unable to draw me into conversations which would involve more complex myth-making about their brilliant children.

To be fair, most of the students are fairly wonderful or at least they are no worse than any other children from around the world. Today was focused on Matyom 1 students (1st year of secondary school) and these youngsters are still new enough to slightly fear their teachers and behave most of the time. I have only had difficulties with a couple of them and these were really minor issues like them being a bit hyperactive, or not taking down notes in class. In fact these first year students are really a joy to teach, and their classroom always feels like a bit of an oasis after some of the more chaotic classes I teach.

Today's activities commenced with a bit of speechmaking by the big-wigs in the department and then our introductions and brief speeches. My introduction always causes a bit of confusion as male nurses are very uncommon in Thailand; the administration would prefer to say that I'm a doctor, but I refuse to go along with this. I also get irritated when they introduce me as English, but they don't do this so much anymore. Mind you, they still introduce one of the Hong Kong teachers as English even though he only spent a couple of years there at university; he seems to like this though.

After the introductions and long-speeches to explain how the lucky the children were to belong to our school and then it was time for one to one contact with the parents. I was given my own little desk and waited for the parents to come for a chat. They always pick my table last because they worry that our conversation in Thai will prove to be a struggle; I can't blame them for this as they are usually right in their assumption.

The parents almost all seemed worried about what the teachers are going to say about their most precious nippers, and this makes me feel a bit sad about the whole thing; it makes me feel like a bit of a fraud if I'm honest. It is obvious that these parents want the best for their children, and as I'm now a parent myself I can really understand this. The truth is that I have reservations about our programme. Despite all the effort put into bright brochures, power-point presentations, and posters of our top students doing interesting things, it all seem a bit false; a bit too much like decoration with no substance. The fact is that too much effort is put into making things look good, and hardly any into making them good. On the other hand students do leave our school and get into university; some even into good universities. So what is my problem?

Well, I dislike the fact that I'm put into a position of having to tell parents that their child just got 70% in a subject were they so often obviously don't deserve anywhere near that mark. The parents themselves often appear dubious; after all their son or daughter can barely speak any more English than when they first started the programme. The parents of the good students are disappointed because their child, who spends hours studying every evening, isn't doing much better than their neighbour's child who never studies; even 100% doesn't mean much when the lowest grade is 70%. The bad students give me the knowing look which says "see, I don't have to work hard to pass this course" while the good students just seem a bit disillusioned.

The parents' day finished and all the parents seemed satisfied that they are doing the best for their children. Personally, I'm not so sure. As time goes on, I seem to be getting more and more cynical about the whole thing.