People Who Cut and Harm Themselves

I recently had the unfortunate experience to find that someone in my family was what is called a "cutter" A cutter is someone who is in such great emotional pain that the only way to make themselves feel better is to cut themselves. Although some people who self- injure themselves do not suffer from any forms of recognized mental disorder.

Normally no one is aware that this is occurring in the individual because they are cutting themselves in places that can not be seen. While more than 70% of self-injurers are women, mostly between the ages of 11 and 26, they come from all races and social classes. What self-injurers have in common is that they are often children of divorce, and as many as 90% grew up in homes where communication between parents and child was lacking and where messy problems were ignored, avoided, and ultimately left in silence. About 50% of self-injurers have a history of sexual or physical abuse. Many cutters simply lack the language skills to express their emotions. Instead, they feel only self-loathing, alienation, and an intense desire to do themselves harm. Some of these are defined as personality disorders and can create multiple personalities similar to a bipolar diagnosis although the individual may not be bipolar at all.

As with my recent experience, I received a phone call expressing that she had sliced herself and there was blood everywhere after a traumatic situation . I advised her to call 911. 46 stitches later and a mental hospital stay for 4 days the therapy begins. Although I am in the learning stages of how to assist her in the type of therapy required for her condition, I myself being a clinical depressant, am hoping that my participating in several therapy sessions and different medications for the last 17 years will assist in guiding her to the need to follow through. I have done some research on the topic and find the 5 suggestions below to be the best in helping people who cut themselves.

1. Know some of the reasons people cut themselves. It is a method of
coping, and is sometimes, but not always, triggered by childhood abuse.
People who cut themselves usually had poor role models in dealing with
stressful emotions as they were maturing, so they struggle to know how \
to cope

2. Learn that cutting is not a failed suicide attempt, nor an attention
getting maneuver. Most people who cut go to great lengths to hide the
fact, not gain attention from it. Cutting is a choice, and ending it by
learning how better to cope is a choice as well. It is not anyone's
fault.

3. Understand what motivates a person to cut themselves. They are easily
emotionally overwhelmed, and they don't know how to cope. Cutting
releases endorphins, which quickly calm their emotions to a level they
can handle. Often they feel bad about it afterward, causing them to
hide the cuts and scars with long sleeved shirts

4. Seek professional help. If the person is a friend at school, you might
want to talk to your guidance counselor or school nurse. If the person
is your child, seek the advice of your family doctor as to where to go
for help. Understand that the cutting behavior is their way of coping
with life, and you need to help them to learn better ways to cope with
their emotions

5. Show empathy and love toward the person by asking how they're doing.
People who cut usually avoid the subject and don't want to talk about
it, but pretending you don't notice isn't going to help them. It won't
be easy, but acknowledging the problem and encouraging them to seek help
is the most loving thing you can do for them.

I do hope that some of this information is helpful and that anyone who may think they have a family member, friend, sibling or child that is showing signs of extreme emotional behaviors or all of the sudden go over the top with piercings, tattoos, hair do's anything that is a sudden change to what they were very well could be a sign of a problem that may need immediate attention. Don't let your loved one go unattended to.

By:
Jade Lunden
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