Pets: Loss and Grieving

Pets can bring us amazing joy and companionship throughout their relatively short lives. We can also experience crippling sadness and a huge sense of loss at their passing. In days gone by, it was more common to hear "oh, it was just a pet" and people would be expected to just move on; however they felt on the inside...

These days, with pets living longer and healthier lives and enjoying such an important and integral position in the human family, grief over losing a pet is a serious concern. Thankfully, fellow animal lovers, veterinary schools and counseling professionals now offer a huge variety of resources for those experiencing the pain of losing a dearly loved friend.

I had a friend once, who lost a dear little Schnauzer called 'Cobber'. She went through a period of not really knowing what was wrong and took him to a vet for tests etc... The saddest thing was, she loved him so much that she nearly made herself ill prematurely expecting the worst.

With all the tests and exploratory surgery, my friend clung to hope. She even paid extra to get the results back earlier than they would have been; 3 days instead of 10.

It turned out that Cobber had lymphosarcoma. This was an illness, they said, that would see him survive for approximately another 6 - 12 months. During this time, Cobber would also have to undergo monthly chemotherapy.

My friend had him euthanized that very afternoon.

Most of the time, Suzy, my friend, doesn't talk about Cobber anymore... But when she does, it is so painful to hear the grief and loss in her voice.

"How long am I going to feel this way? Sometimes I think I just can't stand it. If only I knew that he was happy and healthy somewhere, and that, someday, we'll be together once more, with all the other animals we have both known."

My friend is an avid animal lover, and when I hear her talk, I sometimes wonder if she isn't just a little bit more concerned about the animal kingdom than she is about humans... But so what? Her pets have kept her happy for many years. But the pain I see in her face when she talks about Cobber makes me wonder if lavishing so much love on a pet is worth the grief and loss when the time finally comes.

Seeing Suzy with her 5 dogs, 2 cats, 3 hens, and 2 ducks tells me what I need to know.

It IS worth it.