Planning to Have Your First Child? Pros and Cons of Becoming a Mother

Everyone thinks of having a baby as fun and exciting, but not many people think of the many stresses that come along with it (unless they have had a child). As a new expectant mother, emotions can run wild. One minute she can be overjoyed, and then the next minute she can be scared and worried. Some mood swings are normal during pregnancy, but if it is thought of as a threat, and dread is the main emotion, it can have a dramatic effect on things after the baby is born.

A new baby brings many stresses, both good and bad. Such things as new clothes and diapers can be a good or bad stress. For example, if finances aren't a problem, then it would be fun to shop for clothes and things. However, if a person has low income, then this becomes a major negative stress just to provide the basic necessities needed. Marital status is also a major factor. For example, if the mother is married and the father is helpful and supportive, then she can relax more and enjoy the experience. If she is a single mom, things can be much more difficult. Chances are, she would then have to work, adding even more stress to the situation. If all aspects and stresses are negative, then parenting is looked upon as a burden and the experience is not a happy one.

The many role changes and responsibilities that come with a new baby can be overwhelming. If looked upon as a challenge it can be a joyful experience. It is to wonder if one is doing things the right way, and to strive what is best. But if a new mother continually worries and fears that she is doing the wrong things, it can lead to a feeling of helplessness or loss of control and can cause depression.

Many resources are available to new mothers, such as support groups, etc. The key is to make use of these resources. If a mother is constantly worried and fearing she is a "bad parent" then there is not a lot of energy left to seek help. Simple things such as getting together with other mothers, or taking turns babysitting can help tremendously. If mom is spending time with the baby constantly and not taking time out for herself, this can also effect the mother-child relationship. The mother can begin to resent the child for taking up all of her time and energy, instead of enjoying time with the baby.