Poem on Hitler's Rise to Power

And atheists roam the land free,

There was a man, whom had a strange moustache,

And this is the tails of he, (1933-1934)

It all began one February,

When evil plots were transpired,

But then a man turns around and says,

"Oi! The Reichstag is on fire"!

Who did it I hear you cry,

Well I don't so I won't tell you then,

Oh you want to know?

Then I'll tell you so,

That a man was found at the scene.

Marinus van der Lubbe was his name,

And a Dutch Communist by nature,

And the Nazis being jolly and paranoid,

Said "It's a plot to take over the land of our chancellor",

And ruin the flow of this poem,

Although,

It may have been unnoticeable if I didn't mention it.

That night like Santa,

The Nazis put 4000 communists in their sack,

And lead them into jail,

Then Hitler gained Emergency powers,

And shoved them into cells,

With not a judge wig in site.

And with these emergency powers,

Many were taken,

For a nice little chat,

In jail where they sit,

For opposing the mighty Hitler,

And his crazy moustache.

Then one March when the weather was fair,

All the people gathered in a cubicle,

For some funny business of the greatest kind,

As many people were nicely told,

"Please vote for the Nazis,

Or I fear I'll trip and make a hole appear in your head",

So of course,

Many voted,

And the Nazis were happy to see,

They got under half the amount of votes.

Yay hooray yippee!

But of course Hitler didn't know when to say "Yay!"

And continued to reach for the top,

So he thought "What can I do?

To allow myself more?

I know" He cried "I'll get myself,

An Enabling Law!"

So with a happy face and hope in his heart,

Hitler banned the reds from voting,

"It's for the best of course" He says,

"Because the colour red attracts bulls you see,

And bulls make an awful mess on the carpet"

With the reds out of the way Hitler still had to persuade,

The voters of the centre,

There they sit with their centred noses,

Their centred mouths,

And their town centre in Germany,

What could Hitler possibly offer them?

"If you vote for me oh your holy centrallnesses"

Grovelled Hitler kissing their centred hands,

"I will protect your centred church,

By centring my priorities on it",

This of course pleased the centre party,

And off they walked in glee,

And that is the brave tale of Hitler,

Tricking the centre party.

So with the aid of the centre party,

And the reds banished from voice,

Hitler's only opposition left,

Were the democrats of social choice,

"Pah!" Says Hitler with lots of phlegm,

"I need not fear those clowns,

The only reason they are standing,

Is because I haven't crushed them into mounds,

So with that the voting began for Hitler's attempt at power,

And with 444 to 94 Hitler began to tower,

"Hahaha!" He's laughing,

He has a funny laugh indeed,

Like a gorilla strangling a vacuum cleaner,

"Now Germany is mine! I have the power to pass any law I want",

And with that Germany had many more jolly encounters,

With Hitler and his happy men.

"I say" Says Hitler with a boom like a mouse,

Trying to gnaw through wire,

"We must solve the problem of these unions of trade,

They give people hope of equality and a fair say,

We should break a lot of windows,

And merge all into one,

But we need a name" Growled Hitler,

Why he growls I'm unsure,

"I have it!" He says with glee,

"We'll call it the DAF controlled by us Nazis!"

"Yippee my ideas are so great they make Germany smile!"

But what next Hitler thought to himself,

He had power beyond his wildest dreams,

But what of those who have a fair share?

"I will not let other parties bicker,

This will make people unhappy,

That is why I've decided to end these disputes,

By banning all parties but mine,

Oh what a jolly fun leader I am,

With flattened hair and funny moustache,

I'll make people smile,

And love their country once again."

Then one June in 1934,

Hitler was scared of his own shadow,

That is saying that his shadow is the SA,

And the leader from where he hallowed,

"They must be stopped" Says Hitler,

Putting his size six foot down,

"They'll take over my beautiful armies,

And poison them with their idiocy,

I need to stop Christmas from coming to,

But that's another story."

So on the night when the knives were long,

All the SA members got out of their beds,

Although their stockings were empty they got a treat,

And were asked to give their lives,

But the selfish ones that wouldn't give,

Including the leader oh selfish one,

So they had no choice but to take the life,

And then they had more fun.

And then one fateful and leaf falling August,

The funniest thing happened,

Hindenburg the German president's,

Heart stopped beating and,

He then decided in a breath that he didn't make,

That Hitler should be president,

And with this power all high and mighty,

Like a hippopotamus on the moon,

He had achieved the goal of absolute power,

And all of Germany swooned.

And with this great new power,

With the highest office in the land,

Hitler got the army and said,

"Will you please follow me off a cliff?

And slowly all die one by one for me?"

And of course the army gave cheer,

And made Hitler supreme lemming of the army,

And all powerful to all.

And that is the great tale of Adolf,

The moustache nosed man of fear,

But what of the Germany you all love so?

What happens to the country of joy?

Well that all depends if you can be bothered to,

Look in a text book "Oh What Joy!"