Poem: If My Breathing Stops

If my breathing stops
I'm not dead.
I am only holding my breath,
Shutting my eyes,
waiting for easier times-
simpler moments
that do not force my blood
into my cheeks and
flush my face and
numb my toes.

And I caught a glimpse
of this life that I dream of:
The breath that I would breathe
would be slower
And the song that I sing
would have purpose-
No fruitless bellowing,
No senseless humming.
Only real words for the world to hear.

If my breathing stops,
I am not dead.
Even though I wish and wish
for the simplicity of nighttime
darkness-
For the ease of falling asleep.