Positive Parenting: Dealing with a Supermarket Meltdown

Have you ever been in the middle of the grocery store watching your frustrated child scream while onlookers stare and shake their heads? You are not alone. Many kids try this charade at least once, more if you let them. Dealing with a supermarket meltdown can be trying. My experience as a veteran mom and former nanny has taught me a trick or two on this front.

Keep calm and carry on. If you don't give attention to the whining and fussing, many kids will eventually stop. After all, why put on a performance when there's no audience? Just continue your normal routine as if there was no fit going on whatsoever. Other customers may stare, but most kids will calm down within a short period of time and all will be well. If this is not your kid and the fussing and tantrums continue, move on to the next method.

Laugh it off. This is one of my favorite ways to stop the crankiness. I like to just look at the child who's carrying on with a tantrum and burst out laughing. The majority of the time, it provokes a smile and many times even a laugh. I find this method to be the easiest way to solve the issue. But won't it teach the child that throwing a fit is funny? Not in my experience. I've found that it teaches the kids how silly a fit is and they will think twice before trying again. Most likely, laughter is not the reaction they expected.

Don't give in. Now, other patrons may make this a little difficult because some may become irritated. But if you hold your own and refuse to give the child whatever it is that is causing the fit, you teach them who is boss. Years ago, one of the kids I used to nanny for would throw a fit every single time he went into the store, but he didn't do it with me, only other people. Why? I didn't give in and I laughed it off. Kids are smarter than some give them credit for. In fact, that's often why they throw the fits to begin with. They are seeing how far they can go. With me, it isn't very far when it comes to misbehaving in public. I may buy the kids treats, but not if there's a tantrum involved.

Relentlessness may require a trip out the door. If none of the solutions seem to be working, try sitting in the car with the child until the crankies go away. If you walked to the store, try a waiting area or an outside bench. By removing the child from the situation, you are showing them that a tantrum does not get an item, it gets a fast exit out the door. Sit in the time-out area for the necessary (yet reasonable) amount of time. Once your child begins to calm down, you can explain what you expect when you reenter the store. If you are in the time-out location for longer than what should be reasonable, it may be time to move on to the last suggestion

When all else fails, leave for good and return by yourself. If retreating to a time-out location is not working, you should leave altogether. While this may be an inconvenience to you, it will be well worth your sanity on the next shopping trip. Would you rather be inconvenienced one time or many? If you let your child continue the tantrum and you do not leave, it teaches the child that whining, crying, and more is permitted. However, by leaving you show the child that misbehavior will not be tolerated at the supermarket.

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