Prejudice in South Carolina

My family, husband, teenage son and I recently moved to South Carolina from Florida not knowing what was in store for us. We have a Spanish last name and because of this and our looks not to mention our religious beliefs are judged, hated and scorned. We had no clue of how back minded and set in their ways the people in South Carolina can be. Of course this was the last state to relinquish slavery. Not to mention the underbelly of the civil rights movement. I had no idea how and why racism still duels here in the 21^st century. Even the Black Americans are racist now and still have a preempted mind with no consideration for whites and a new found hate for Latinos or Hispanics. I summarize that since blacks have carried the cross for so long, they can now do unto Latinos or Hispanics what was done onto them. Not to mention Hispanics are the new found slaves for the White Anglo Saxon Protestants now as they are exploited. Everyone is so self-righteous here and so set in their beliefs most of them religious. Now I am not saying that we are ungodly, not by all means, I believe in God, I just do not believe that anyone should push their religious beliefs on anyone. It saddens me, how we are judged by who we are and what religion we belong to when one of our primary religious beliefs is that we have no right to judge anyone and that every man is equal in God's eyes.

We simply do not fit in, as I was told by a previous employer after I was handed the pink slip after working for three months and then helping her move to a new office. I moved 3,000 files, numerous boxes and was used as a mover instead of as a medical assistant. I realized there was no desk for me and I was let go the day the new office merged and started operating. I do not fit in, I was told. Now again, the odds are stacked against me because this previous employer decided to get rid of me when summer begins and all the kids are fresh out of college and school and doing exactly what I am doing, job hunting. What in the world did I do to deserve this? I ask myself this everyday.

What makes matters inconceivable is that new prospective employers who analyze my experience and my education can't seem to get past my pretty olive skin. I ask myself, are they jealous of me because I tan so nicely, I have great skin and pretty almond eyes and when I am 70 years old I will still look youthful. Are they jealous because they think I came from another country and I am here to take what is supposedly theirs. Why ask if I even speak English, is my resume not in English. Wasn't the add in the newspaper in English. They can not seem to get past what they see. It saddens me to think life is still so primitive here. There is a very clear line between all cultures, races, colors and basic humanity one must wonder are we really co-existing with the rest of the World. I think that my radical decision to sell our house in Florida and move here in search of a more humble and fruitful life was such a risk and nothing good has come of it. Can't enjoy my home because my neighbors a bore me because of my ethnicity. Can't enjoy my marriage because I am a financial and emotional strain on it. Can't enjoy my child's upbringing when he is trying to blend or fit in and never be accepted for what he is . I cannot live with such a great divide when I was taught so differently. There was a time in my life not so long ago that I did not see color, race status or religion. I just saw humanity for the kindness or wretchedness that prevailed.

I guess I am too humble, to naive, not savvy or conniving enough. I lack the cut throated ness that other people have. I lack the selfishness. I lack the religion. What I do not lack is my ethnicity and my beliefs that everyone has some good left in them. Though others have sought to target me as the one that doesn't belong, I feel like everyone has a right to belong and live as they so shall choose. That no one should take that right away . I still thrive to see the little bit of goodness and kindness that is in each person as an individual everyday. Even though I am scorned and judged with every look, I can't bring myself to do the same. My heart can't feel this. It can only feel disappointment and sadness. The disbelief that I have come this far for nothing, because the humanity that surrounds me is ever so disappointed and shameful of another human being. Because that's what we all are, human beings. All are different but we are all the same. There is no one that understands this better than I.