Preparing Your Toddler for a New Sibling's Birth

Making Birth a Family Affair

Summer Minor
Allowing your toddler to be a part of his or her sibling's birth can be a wonderful experience. Sharing the special moment with your child helps to create a bond that is strong, and helps your older child to feel that he is a part of the experience.

Many children feel jealous and afraid when a new sibling enters the family. With the demands of a new baby an older child may feel pushed aside and unimportant. This can be especially so if the child is not yet old enough to fully understand what is going on. To have mother leave for a day or more then return with a new baby that takes up most of her time can be a huge shock to your toddler's delicate environment. This can create tension and distrust between your toddler and new baby.

Preparing your toddler for a new baby begins as soon as you let him or her know about the pregnancy. Keep your child a part of the excitement that builds during the long months. Take your toddler with you to doctor appointments and let him hear the heartbeat, view the ultrasounds, and be treated like an important part of the new family dynamics.

Many places that offer childbirth classes also offer sibling classes that can be helpful for young children to understand their new role and be prepared. If you do not have a sibling class near you ask and see if you can bring your toddler along to a childbirth class with you.

Preparing your child also means helping him to be familiar with the sights and sounds that he may find during the labor. There are a number of websites available that host pictures and videos from various births. Share them with your child, calmly explaining what is happening, and reassuring any concerns your child may have. Let hi know that you may scream or sound angry, but it is OK and you are not mad or upset in anyway. It may become a game to your toddler, making screaming and grunting noises similar to those made by women during labor. That is perfectly OK, as it will help him to become familiar and feel more secure.

You should also have a back up family member on hand in case your toddler does not want to stay during the birth. Even the most prepared toddler can become overwhelmed or frightened and need someone who can remove him from the situation and calm him down. That does not mean that you did not do enough to prepare him, and he certainly will not be scarred from it.

For most of human history birth has been a family affair. Neighbors, friends, and family gathered around the laboring woman to offer support and encouragement. Young children were often near their mothers during this time. Many women say that they feel more in control knowing that their young child is near them, that they draw strength from knowing that they have to remain focused. If you want to have your toddler with you during birth you can be assured that you are helping your young child welcome his or her new sibling and strengthening the family unit.

Published by Summer Minor

Summer Minor is a mother of 3 who practices Attachment Parenting and believes that with gentle guidance children can grow to be who they were meant to be. She blogs about parenting at http://mama2mamatips.com  View profile

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