Preventing an Affair: A Woman's Guide

Divorce is on the rise, nearly fifty percent of all marriages end up not so happily ever after. I'm not statistical savvy but I assume a big chuck of the reason is due to extramarital affairs.

Women, I want to point my finger at you throughout this article. Not that you have done any wrong, but women are just as likely to have an affair as men; and I believe a lot of us overlook that fact.

I want to challenge women to hold onto their sexual integrity. Sexual integrity is more than just a physical aspect. Sexual integrity also includes mental, emotional, and spiritual aspects. The goal is to keep all four balanced in order to remain pure to our husbands.

The problem with our thinking today is we assume remaining faithful only requires us to set physical boundaries. However, women are much more emotionally vulnerable and can be easily swept into an emotional affair which can easily lead to a physical affair.

Women, we need to be on guard. We need to guard our hearts from the temptations of the world.

First of all, I would suggest setting some emotional boundaries. Draw the line at affection. Once you start to show affection for someone, meaning that you want to tell them how you feel and you want feedback on your words. If you begin to think of another man constantly, wonder how he feels about you, make excuses to see him, or want to be alone with him; run in the other direction! You're only setting yourself up for disaster.

To add to that point I would never suggest that you have a friend of the opposite sex or to ever be alone with a member of the opposite sex. This is how you prevent yourself from getting into sticky situations.

Secondly, never compare your husband to other men. Let's face it, you know the worst about your husband, but other men's flaws are masked so it is easy to see them as "better" than your husband. Once you put another man above your husband for his charming, witty, intelligent personality, you begin to lose the passion you once had for your husband. This is a dangerous game to play; it will only leave you feeling empty and vulnerable. Remind yourself constantly of your husband's good qualities so you can keep him number one.

Thirdly, self-confidence has much to do with your need for attention. I know that most women feel that their husband doesn't compliment them enough. (As well, I'm sure they feel that we don't do the same for them) Beware of looking for self-gratification from other men. Being egotistical will keep you starved for men's attention to verify that you are attractive. And on the flip side, if you have a very shallow view of yourself you will be easily taken by any man who throws a look your way. It's healthy to have a good, balanced view of yourself in order to protect yourself from another man's grasp.

Temptation is a part of life, acting on it isn't. We are all human so it is only natural to have sexual, impure thoughts about other men. However, we should not dwell on these thoughts and entertain them.

If you guard your heart and your thoughts you can catch the early warning signs of becoming emotionally attached to a man other than your husband. There's always a point to stop and turn around. Ask yourself what your motives are and what your standards are.

Ask yourself if your weakness for an hour is worth the pain it could cause for a lifetime.