Proper Etiquette for a One-Night Stand

The "one-night stand" is a fairly popular option for young people, singles, and those with no religious qualms about uncommitted or premarital sex.

In popular culture and television references, a one-night stand often occurs between two strangers at a bar. In actuality, a one-night stand can happen after a work function, party, or any other sort of social gathering.

What are the proper etiquette rules for a successful one-night stand, and how do you avoid awkward "next day" conversation with your partner? Here are some tips:

Make sure you establish that it is a one-night stand

If the other person is expecting you to call or pursue another meeting later on, try to let them know that you have different expectations-that you were expecting this to be a one-time and spontaneous event, and that you may not be available in the future (either because you live in a different city, have a relationship, etc).

Determine whether you want to see them again

Some one-night stands do turn into something "more serious"-if you have a great time and the sex is good, there is no reason why you shouldn't take down your partner's phone number and contact them at a later date. If, however, you truly only want to see them this one time, make this explicitly clear beforehand. Confusion and misdirection are the enemies of a fun, responsible, and honest single life.

Set ground rules for "staying over"

If you don't want your partner to spend the night, let them know beforehand so it doesn't seem like you are "kicking them out" right after having sex. Before you get intimate, mention that you need to be up very early for work, or have family coming into town, or whatever other circumstance it is that prevents you from allowing them to spend the night.

Don't send conflicting signals

If you intend for it to be a one-night stand, calling the person a few days later and having an intimate forty-five minute conversation about your life goals may not be appropriate. Similarly, highly personal email or Facebook contact should be limited-don't write on the person's wall frequently (or at all) after a one-night stand. Don't MySpace "stalk" them or overwhelm the person with contact. If they are interested in something more than a one-night stand, they will probably let you know at some point-but pushing the issue is never encouraged.

Finally, remember to practice safe sex-wear a condom and only hook up with a partner you trust to some degree. Don't assume that he or she will have condoms with them; always have a stash of them available just in case. A one-night stand can get very troubling indeed when it leads to unwanted pregnancy or an STD. Be safe, think ahead, and have a good time.