Put Your Head on My Shoulder

I rested my very tired head on his shoulder. He was a very handsome man. I met him in my favorite hangout. Lin's bar on the south seedy side of town. He was tall, dark and very handsome. He also lent me an attentive ear. I needed that. His deep brown almost black shiny eyes sparkled and gazed into mine. Dressed so well, in a black suit with a jazzy red tie, he looked quite out of place in the bar. I knew, but embraced this stranger. He bought me a drink. How romantic. I tilted my long blonde haired self towards his shape. It was a pleasing shape. He was built. I crossed a leg over, shifted my body into an endearing position, clad in my skin tight little black dress. It brought out my sharp glowing green eyes. And they gleamed at him with pleasure. I almost purred. Such a nice man, I thought. I went into it. His "How are you?" triggered an emotional eruption from me. I told him just how I was. Maybe that was a mistake. Maybe not. A bar is a place to meet others with a sadder story than yours, I had always thought. I divulged. He heard. Every word.

My story was no different than a million other girls. Abuse, torment, married young, looking for prince charming and finding a monster next to you. The usual. Trying to get away and it was quite impossible. Death do you part and all that. I was property. Owned by a powerful, cunning and deadly man. Too late for me, I sighed. He smiled. That smile got me in the gut. It was an all knowing smile. He ordered me another drink. I went to the ladies room and soon returned. Curious. What did this guy want with me? I drank and listened to his story. Very interesting. Never married. An insurance agent. Made a decent living. No kids. While I was listening to him speak, I began to get very sleepy. Not like me. I can drink anyone under the table. I felt myself almost fall off of the barstool. Prince charming caught me. I remember that. I opened my mouth to tell him to call me a cab. The words never came out.

I rested my head on his shoulder. We were on a bus. I wondered how on earth I had gotten on a bus. I never rode one before in my life. Bright lights shined and I blinked at them sleepily. Then darkness came. I guess I slept. I don't know. I woke up in a darkened apartment. On a red velvet sofa. I blinked in confusion. Where was I? A scent of cinnamon and lilac greeted me. I sat up. I said a timid "Hello?" to the air. No answer. I got up and was barefoot. I padded around. A white kitchen, spotless. Coffee had been brewed. A cup was beside the white coffee maker. I ignored it. I was awake enough. I went through the entire apartment. Empty. A bedroom, a closet, a hall and the kitchen with adjoining living room. All empty. Just me. One door. In the living room. It had no doorknobs. Oh my God, this door can't be opened. I pushed on it. Nothing. No exit.

I slowly sat myself back down on the red velvet couch. "Elle, you have gotten yourself into a mess." I whispered. His name was Russ. Russell. Something like that. I closed my eyes. When I opened them, I was still here. Where was here? I had no idea. A movement caught my attention. Out of the corner of my eye. A huge black long leg. I turned. A black spider was climbing down the living room wall, from the ceiling. It was at least four feet long. I tried to scream. It disappeared. Gone. I blinked. A man appeared. There in front of me. He was tall, long brown hair and beard, dressed in what appeared to be gladiator clothes. He held a shield of some sort in front of him. It was red and resembled the native American dream catchers art that I had seen. Bright red yarn mixed with glowing fire yellow thread. He spun it. It turned dizzily and rolled from his hands down the hall. "The wheel of hell!" he screamed. I screamed too. Poof. He was gone. I next heard the words spoken "Do you have your mind cap on?" I froze. Obviously, well, I did not, I thought. Two men walked in to the room and kneeled by the red couch. They were short, stocky, blonde and dressed in animal skins. "You are mind numb. You are going to die, if you don't leave him" they both said. I nodded. They both vanished. A short bald man appeared in front of me. He was very old. "You have the power." he stated. Dressed in very old looking rags, pants filled with holes and a torn shirt, he bowed to me. I returned the bow. He was gone. A smiling lady appeared then. Long dark silky hair and dressed in purple robe. She said softly "You must go, you know." I started crying and she said "You will make it, my child." I smiled. "Go now!" she cried. I did. I ran right out of that door with no knobs. I think that I knocked it down.

I came to in my house. I was alone. I soon filed for divorce and got a lifetime protective order. My family helped me. I never once told anyone what had actually happened to me. The torment did not stop for many, many years. From him. Still, I remembered the vivid lessons that I had learned. I could survive this. You can die from another's hand or you can die trying to be free. Freedom was the answer for me. Once upon a time, I searched for love. Now, I let it search for me. I am blessed alone. Many months later, I got a letter in the mail. No return address. I read. It was a clipping from a New York famous newspaper. It said this. CIA drug said to cause hallucinations. This drug has been given to many in the USA. Some die. Some survive. The reason for this drug is not known. It's abuse has led to many arrests. Still, no trace of this drug has yet to be found. There was a picture of the man that I had met in the bar. I gasped.

A few days later, I wrote a letter. It said, basically, that I would have died if I had not realized that I needed to fight for me. For my freedom. I left it on the steps of my house. The next day, it was gone. I smiled. Well, maybe many did die. I was not one of them, thank God. I had the strength. What is meant to be will be, right? I am free. At least for this very precious moment in eternity. I see. I am happy.