Raising a Selfish Nation

A recent study completed by five psychologists found that today's American college students are more narcissistic and self-centered than ever. Our nation's college students also place a higher emphasis on gaining material wealth than their predecessors. The study's conductors worry that this trend will be potentially harmful to interpersonal relationships, as well as to American society.

I can't help but wonder if these findings actually take anybody by surprise? For decades our society has been obsessed with pop psychology. Most parents, teachers, and even psychologists will grab a hold and endorse anything that says it will build self-esteem or nurture an emotionally sensitive child. We have millions of people who are obsessed with Dr. Whoever, or any book that comes on the market which promises parents the insight necessary raise self-confident, driven individuals.

Perhaps parents should not be faulted completely. After all, most parents are doing whatever they think will help their child achieve success-however they define it-as an adult. They want their child to be happy, respected, educated and, of course, wealthy. In order to achieve this goal, they must supply their child with a strong ego that can withstand criticism or even ridicule from others. For example, how can a child rise above his circumstances to achieve prestige and financial freedom if he does not believe he is an important and worthy person? However, good intentions don't excuse foolish behavior that causes harmful results.

Since when has money, in and of itself, ever brought true happiness to an individual? Money is nice, I won't deny that, but financial prosperity is not a guarantee of a happy and fulfilled life. The story of many on the streets is that they once were wealthy, but they lost it all. There is no real security in money. How easily it can be lost through bad investments, fraud, gambling, natural disasters, a divorce where a prenuptial agreement was not in place, etc.

What about humility? Instead of teaching our children to find fulfillment in serving and being a help to others, we have taught them that the world should bow down to them. College students, as this study proves, feel that they should be able to do whatever they want that is right for them. There is no concern for the individuals around them, only a self-promoting, "I deserve the best" attitude. This egotistical, selfish approach to life can only cause damage as these people eventually enter into marriages in which both husband and wife feel that their needs should be met first, and the children involved won't even be part of the equation.

Parents need to make a change in their approach to rearing their children. They must stop teaching their child that he is the most important person in the world and that he should do whatever he wants to facilitate his own happiness. Parents who do this are setting their children up for disappointment, because true happiness cannot be found in material possessions. Happiness is found as we give ourselves to the One who made us, as well as to those around us.