Rasing Children in a Monogamous Culture

How to Parent with Racial Awareness

Lea Anderson
We moved to Montana from Northern California where there was a bit of diversity. Not as much as in the Bay Area, but enough that on the way to the grocery store we'd see at least one person who wasn't white. In moving to Montana we were pretty concerned about how our children would react to other races, and we even considered moving somewhere else that had other races. Children are not naturally 'racist' but just that they (and all people, actually) are wary of the unfamiliar. That includes anyone who is different, whether they have cerebral palsy, are in a wheelchair, are elderly, speak a different language, or are of a different skin color. I am very much open to suggestions of how to have my children have open minds to those who are different than themselves, but for now we are using dolls with different skin color to try and establish that God made us with different skin tones, and that is normal and familiar. I had considered letting my children watch TV shows showing the variety of skin tones, but I think the 'risks' of watching TV would outweigh the benefits.

For being fearful of the elderly (again, because they are different from what normal is for most children) we are going to start visiting a retirement home regularly. I am sure that the people where will love to see my young one, and I look forward to teaching my child the wisdom and knowledge that the elderly have to offer.

For being fearful of people with disabilities, I'm not sure what we'll do. I worked in a group home for people with severe disabilities when I was 19 or so, and *I* had to get used to being around disabled people. When I walked in, I just was unsure of what would hurt them, how to react to things like seizures and drooling, and what my place was in their care and well being. That's embarrassing to admit. After a couple weeks it was second nature, and we all had a good time. Overall it was a wonderful experience.

I'd prefer that my children be comfortable around everyone, so I'm going to see what I can do about that.

Published by Lea Anderson

Follower of God, Wife to my honey, Momma to my baby girl, Medical Transcriptionist, Maker of boutique children's items  View profile

4 Comments

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  • Elizabeth Eng10/15/2008

    I was confused by the use of the word "monogamous". Have you thought about editing/changing this?

  • Bunting Resources7/25/2007

    Well I hope that you figure out things to do, I think the dolls are a good idea. Maybe by selecting the particular show or movie that offered diversity you could still keep your children from watching things you didn't want them too. Don't forget about books and magazines too.

  • Lea Anderson7/25/2007

    Thanks Mommy2lots, but there *are* no other neighborhoods here! That's what had me concerned. In CA I would go to non-white neighborhoods pretty often because the housing was cheaper there and often the restaurants were a lot better!

  • Mommy2Lots7/24/2007

    Good job for thinking about this. There are people who don't. As a person of mixed racial background, my kids already have rich exposure to different races. We also live in Houston now, which, of course, has tons of diversity because it's so big. When we were in Denver, there was diversity, but I think there's much more here. Try taking your kids to different neighborhoods for grocery shopping and other errands. Visit zoos, museums, and other places that evreyone frequents. The more you are in public places, the more diverse the exposure will be. Good luck. :-)

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