Real Housewives of Atlanta Season 3 Episode 12 Recap

Oh Mylanta...Atlanta. I fear we're going to have an OC repeat of this one. Remember last seaosn of OC? We had all this drama and fun times then it just sorta fizzled til the end. I think that's what's going to happen here. What a snore fest. So let's recap.

What we loved...

Cynthia. Cynthia is dry, doesn't put up with a lot of crap and handles herself pretty well in that group. She over shares and trusts too much, but in that scraggle mess about the whole obvious joke "Friend Contract" she didn't let any of those hags win.

Bedazzled microphones. Because, like...they instantly make you a better singer and dancer. "I just know this is going to be better as soon as I get my studded mic!" Which I guess is true if they remember to cover the 'on' switch with glue and rhinestones.

Shereé stirring turds! That was awesome how she just complimented the hens on not pecking each other's eyes out then said, "Maybe we need a contract"...bwahahaha! Loved infinity.

Having a wedding at a museum. Love it. Elegant, classy and different.

'You know what's weird?' Cynthia's brilliant comeback in her confessional to Kim calling her 'friend contract' weird.

The spa lady's facial expressions. That poor woman looked like she happened upon an alien pod. Go back and watch her face when all the squawking happens! Priceless.

What we didn't love...

Kandi in a wig...Kandi's 'singing face'...that is all. Great song, beautiful voice...ugly facial expressions singing it. And burn the wig.

Phaedra's ignorance... if Phaedra knew anything about anything, it's been well documented that Kim went to UConn and is a legitimate nurse. So stop with the 'stripper' references. She's a hooker...get it right. Phaedra really isn't one to talk with her wonderful past as an alleged 'groupie' of the rap scene.

These women without makeup in HD. Whoaaaaaaaa....special thanks to Phaedra and Kandi for at least keeping the eye makeup on. Take note guys. That's what you really wake up to in the morning.

NeNe. Couple of things with ol' NeNe. She's spineless for one. She should've stuck up for Cynthia and told those hens to knock it off. But she just kind of sat there and let Kim go after poor Cynthia over something that was supposed to be between them. The other thing that bugged about NeNe is how she just sort of expected celebs to knock on her cubicle for an interview. I'll never understand why these housewives think they are more famous than they are. They do know that only a couple of million people watch this show right? Compared to triple what a horrible network show pulls in?

Kim's side boob and love handles. Ok, this sounds horribly snarky of me, but good lawd, someone buy her bigger pants and for the love of all things holy, discourage her from ever, EVER flashing us side hogan! For cheese and rice sake, it's all veiny and saggy with that weird flap of armpit skin...let's do a nice top and maybe something backless. Also, she's a grown woman so we can forget the racks of clothes from Justice/Limited Too ok? Blech.

Arianna, never grab your mother's boobs like that again. Thank You.

Shereé blowing cash on stuff she can't afford. It's self explanatory. I loved that she was trying to do something nice for her daughter, but her boyfriend saying, "Are we going to get a bill for this in a couple of days," kinda said it all.

Kandi being Switzerland. Girl, don't just sit there all wide eyed when you did most of the poop stirring between Phaedra and Kim in the first place.

Jokes about smoking and eating disorders. Yeah...ok, I'm not one to cry foul on this, but it seemed in pretty poor taste for a model to say she was gonna barf her last meal, and Kim saying she was gonna smoke til the day she died.

So there you go...this show needs a shot of something, because after being in love with it for so many weeks, they're losing me. Next week, NeNe's interviewing career may not be all she hoped it would be...

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