Realistic, Healthy Living for those Addicted to Being Busy

When was the last time you did absolutely nothing, like sitting on a lawn chair outside staring at the trees or watching a silly re-run on television while sprawled on the couch? Instead, you probably watch the nightly news while cooking dinner as a load of clothes runs through the wash cycle. Or you helped your son with his homework while answering work-related e-mails on your laptop. We've become a nation of multitaskers because we believe that the more we accomplish, the richer our lives will be. But the truth is the more we multitask, the less happy, creative and rested we are.

Granted, we all have busy lives with work, family and extra activities we are involved in. There are reports to write, dinners to cook, laundry to wash, children to chauffeur, PTA, shopping, cleaning, and an endless array other things to fill our lives. Busy lives can be interesting and rewarding but overly-busy lives can wear us down, stress us out and even make us sick. The way to beat our addiction to being busy is to understand our own limits, set priorities, learn to say no and stop to smell the roses.

Know Your Limits

Only you know how much stress you can take before you break. Forever pushing yourself beyond that limit is unhealthy for both your mind and body so learn to be completely honest with yourself.

Before committing to one more thing write down your current schedule so you clearly see how many hours you spend each day on being busy. Include the hours you spend at work, doing household chores, taking care of the children or running to activities. Make sure to include the time you need to sleep and eat properly. Don't skimp on sleep to make room for other things, be honest about the real time you need to stay rested and healthy. Now, sit back and look at your schedule. If you've used more than 24 hours for each day you have an addiction to being busy.

Set Priorities

Take a long look at your schedule and try to find pockets of time where you can erase activities that are not the most important to you. Like so many people, you may have over-scheduled your life in an attempt to please everyone around you. Women especially are guilty of doing this as they don't want to disappoint anyone. But the truth is the more over-scheduled you are, the less energy you have to give to the projects that you take on. This only leads to disappointing yourself for not being able to accomplish everything you take on. That is why it is necessary to decide what is important and what can be taken away.

Only keep the tasks that you must do (work, sleep, eat, caring for children, etc.), and begin erasing the tasks that you can no longer spend time on in the order of importance to you. If you really enjoy working on the PTA fundraiser, then by all means do it. But if it has become a chore it may be time to hand it off to someone else.

Once you've created new pockets of time in your schedule look at how you can schedule your day to be more time-efficient. Maybe you could stop at the grocery store after picking up the children after school instead of making a separate trip. Or perhaps you can answer phone messages while sitting at your child's soccer practice so you don't have to do it at home. Multitasking so that you can create open time for yourself is much better than multitasking because you have no free time.

Think about your children's activities too while you are trying to cut back. A recent survey reported that 90% of children feel stressed from being too busy and 61% wished they had more free time. Talk to your children and see if there are any activities they are doing but not enjoying. By dropping one of their activities you make time for your child and for you.

Learn to Say No

We seem to be very good at telling our children no when they want something they don't need, but we don't do so well using this word when we are asked to take on a new project or activity. Saying no is our only weapon against over-scheduling, so learn to use it.

First you must conquer the activities that you have erased from your schedule. Simply tell the person you are helping that you can no longer do the project or activity that you used to do. Don't feel guilty - you have put in your time and it's time for someone else to step up to the plate. Pat yourself on the back for having helped in the past and for knowing when it was time to pass the job on.

When you are asked to help with a new project simply say you are already involved with as many extra activities as your schedule allows and you cannot help. Give yourself a break from feeling guilty for this, too. You can't do everything and the sooner you accept this the easier it will be to say no.

Stop and Smell the Roses

You have examined your schedule, found new pockets of time that are not filled with being busy, prioritized your activities and are going to say no from now on so you don't fill that time you have worked so hard to open up. Now just relax. Read a book, go for a walk with the family, take a nap, do whatever you want to do. You will feel revived and ready to take on the busy part of your day with more energy. You have conquered your addiction to being busy all the time and your mind and body will thank you.