Reasons you shouldn't rush into marriage
1. Huge expense involved in both wedding and divorce
Even the smallest wedding will involve spending some money, even if it is just on a wedding dress and a new suit. Those who splurge on an enormous wedding will feel the pain in their wallets as well as their hearts if the marriage fails. Further money that could have been saved will then need to be spent on the divorce. Bank accounts will be lighter and there will be nothing to show for it except useless wedding gifts and regret.
2. Marriage is not a quick fix for relationship problems
One of the main reasons you shouldn't rush into a marriage is the misplaced thought that it will heal any rifts in the relationship. After the fun, early stage of dating is over, couples will sometimes run into problems as they really begin to get to know each other. Planning a wedding can be a good distraction from petty fights but when the vows have been exchanged, the problems will still be there, It is better to admit defeat before a wedding than after.
3. You may not know your partner as well as you think
Being swept away in the excitement of getting to know someone is one of the biggest joys when dating. Finding out you like the same movies, television shows and restaurants is great! But those are the small things. Before you rush into marriage, it is important to learn where your partner stands on the bigger issues of your life together. Do you agree about whether or not you want children? Where do you want to live? Do you have the same values? Without a long talk about these and other issues, the chances of a long lasting marriage could be much slimmer.
4. Lack of understanding about responsibility
There is no denying that weddings are romantic. Then there is the honeymoon and the glow of happiness that stays around for a while. But then reality hits. Bills need paying, chores need to be done and suddenly you realise the honeymoon is over. This is never a problem for couples who are prepared for it and understand the commitment they have made. But for those who have rushed into marriage, it can be a shock. Romance should never be forgotten, but sometimes it must take a back seat to the things that need to be done.
5. Fear of being "left on the shelf"
Even in these changing times, there is still a slight pressure on people to get married. This is particularly true for women, especially those who have made it past the grand old age of twenty six and still don't have a ring on their finger. Feelings of fear at being alone forever begin to settle in very quickly. When this happens, it can be tempting to rush into marriage with the first person who asks you. If you aren't completely sure you are in love with them, it will be hard to remain married to them for the rest of your life. There is nothing wrong with waiting for the right person.
These are just a few reasons why you shouldn't rush into marriage. Weddings are just a one day event, a marriage is supposed to be for life. Before you take those important vows, make sure you are doing so for the right reason. Don't rush the decision.
Published by Kyra Lennon - Featured Contributor in Arts & Entertainment, Travel and Lifestyle
Kyra Lennon has been writing for most of her life. Alongside working on her first full length novel, Kyra has published online content with a focus on dating and relationships, entertainment and travel. A... View profile
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10 Comments
Post a CommentWell-written article! When you get married, you are adding a new member to your family; treat them just as permanent as your brothers and sisters!
Such an excellent article. Reminds me of one I wrote about the worst reasons to get married: http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/5869354/ten_of_the_worst_reasons_to_get_married.html?cat=41
Well done article.
These are all very good reasons not to rush into marriage. I agree that there are still some women who feel that they will be left "on the shelf" if they do not get married young. My cousin's wife told me that when she married my cousin she was afraid this would happen to her. She was 19 at the time. Fortunately, they are still married.
Sophie
Great article! =0)
Great points!
Good advice. I rushed in twice, and it took me years both times to fully understand how unhappy I was as a result. Third time VERY lucky though! Years ago when it wasn't "the done thing" to live together, marriage was the best solution, but now there is no reason why a couple can't live together without being married. Marriage brings a lot of good things, but a lot of commitment too. Divorce brings a whole mountain of grief, and usually a mountain of debt and guilt as well. If you are not 100% sure about a relationship, don't just rush into marriage.
I agree! Marriage is huge, which is why I am still single :)
Especially #3.
Excellent advice. I know of too many people who've rushed into a marriage they weren't ready for. It doesn't turn out pretty. :/