Recipe for Super Bowl Party Success

If you're in a new apartment, and haven't had a chance to christen it with all of the holiday to-do, throw out the welcome mat for the lowest-fuss February fête. If you're planning to leave your pad for better digs, throw one last hurrah before they calculate your damage deposit. The Super Bowl is a great excuse to bring old and new friends together for beer football and fun.

Make it easy on yourself. This is a party not an "event". Let the game be the focus. While you don't want to over-structure the afternoon, do include a few optional activities to get everyone off their rumps. (1) Before the game, hold a national anthem sing-off. Either a capella, accompanied by kazoos, or backed by a borrowed karaoke machine, give your guests a chance to show their talents before the professionals perform. Award prizes for the best, the most William Hung-like, or just to everyone brave enough to participate. (2) In your invites or e-vites, encourage everyone to bring photographs of their childhood athletic attempts. Mix up the pics and try to identify who was the baby-faced t-ball batter and who was the chubby cheerleader. (3) Purchase suction cup dart guns or small foam balls from the toy store. Launch them at the television for bad calls. (4) Create a pool that less than diehard fans can participate in. Draw a 10 square by 10 square grid, each square numbered. Have each guest initial a few squares, and award prizes to whomever has the right score at the end of each quarter. (5) Set up a drinking game based on exotic rules. Do you take a shot whenever a John 3:16 sign comes on camera? For every red flag? Make it a little kooky - just not too frequent. (6) Have a real pigskin available so folks can play a little catch on the lawn.

Decorate your place with standard balloons and streamers in team colors. If you have divided team loyalty among guests, halve the floor in tape and decorate each side of the room in competing colors. Keep a cooler in the den, so that you don't have to miss a play. Refill at commercials. Choose snacks that don't require any utensils and lay them out in sight of the TV. In addition to plenty of beer, relax and provide simple snacks: crackers, cheese, chips, dips, veggies, cold cuts, and sodas. If you're preparing appetizers, assume 12 pieces per person (times number of guests divided by number of appetizers). Provide three types for 8 to 10 guests, four to five for 14 to 16. Try for an equal number of hot and cold snacks.

This looks disgusting, but tastes absolutely fabulous.

Touch Down Toasts

1 tube of uncooked sausage (sage flavored is best)
1 lb. brick of Velveeta
1 Tbs. Worcestershire Sauce
1 loaf of "party" rye (miniature loaf)
dash of ketchup
dill, oregano, or garlic powder to taste
red pepper flakes or Tabasco for spice

Crumble and brown sausage in a large saucepan. Carefully strain excess grease, and drain on paper towels. On low heat, melt "cheese" in a pot, add Worcestershire and ketchup, and other spices as desired. Add sausage to melted mix. Space mini rye on a cookie sheet and spread a large spoonful on each slice. Bake at 350° until cheese browns and the bread gets a little toasty. After toasts have set, they can be frozen in plastic zipper bags and reheated closer to game time.

Instead of providing a full bar, choose one cocktail to make in pitchers.

Hail Marys

2 parts ice-cold tomato juice
1 part vodka
dash of Worcestershire sauce
pinch of black pepper

Mix well and serve over plenty of ice. At your discretion add celery salt, horseradish, Tabasco, or lemon juice. Garnish with a celery stick, dill pickle spear, Slim Jim, or skewer of olives, cocktail onions, and cheddar chunks.

Just grab some buddies and pork rinds and show your team spirit.
May the best team win!