Reducing Fear of Identity Theft - On Being Real and On-line

As an avid gardener I have little care if the latest tips on proper mulching techniques, bulb divisions, or where the newest rose hybrids are to be found are posted by any inventive aliases other on- line members in my gardening group may choose. Within its' contained boundaries I have little fear of the opinions expressed or of its' members intentions as both are non-threatening and the information I gleam and eventually harvest blooms without emotional pain or risk.

There are however other on-line groups I belong to where it is vital to my sense of well- being that these members not be fictitious. For there are many like myself who have been traumatized by events in their lives and/or by the events in their loved ones lives and any posturing or pretense on the part of careless or thoughtless individuals in these groups is a serious threat for emotional hurt and or harm. Let me expand this point by the admission that I once worked the mean streets of Calgary and Vancouver. I did get clean and have lived in anonymity in the suburbs for many years. However my years of safety have not erased the anxiety of my street years and I live with post-traumatic stress disorder and multiple conflicted feelings of guild and shame. So when I joined a support group for the families of murdered sex trade workers and then another for nameless murdered victims I wanted and needed reassurance that the other members in these groups had been well screed to prevent fraudsters and tricksters. So I asked the moderators of these groups for their credentials and then proceeded to do my own on-line investigation of both groups and their moderators. Once I was satisfied that they were genuine I was relieved and then happy to also be real about myself and my contact information. If I had not been asked for my truthful information and if the moderators had not then confirmed this information I would not have joined. I have a need for safety, security and support and how could I have trusted if the moderators had been cavalier about something so important for the building of trust?

It is imperative to those of us who have been devastated by violence, abuse, and the deaths of loved ones to not to feel so alone. I refuse to let fear negate my need to reach out and find emotional support on-line. I investigate the groups I wish to join and I do my own background checks on their moderators. I study their focus, their directives and the length of time since their creation. When all my questions have the necessary answers I then never forget to be grateful to be with others who are as real and genuine as I am.
Elizabeth Hudson