Relationship Idols: Who Do You Adore?

The word idol is used loosely in our everyday language. We watch television shows like American Idol and literally become desensitized to the profundity of the word and begin to incorporate it into our everyday language. What does the word idol really mean? According to the Merriam Webster's dictionary, the world idol is defined as:

§ Someone who is adored blindly and excessively

§ A likeness of something obsolete; pretender, imposter

§ A form or appearance visible but lacks substance

§ An object of extreme devotion; ideal

§ A false conception; a fallacy

* please read again. . . slowly.

After the reading the above list, think about what or who in your life fits this description? Oftentimes these idols are erected without our conscious consent, nevertheless, they exist. Their existence alone robs us blindly of our own personal power.

Once our power becomes misplaced then our intentions becomes misguided. For instance, if you give someone the power to give you worth or to fill you with love (which is impossible for them to do) then you find yourself doing acrobatics just to keep them accepting of your worth. Your attempt to receive genuine love has become misguided and that naturally sets you up for failure. Your power belongs to you and only when this resonates within your being are you able to dethrone the false idol in your life and replace it with the truth. What is that truth? The truth is you are already worthy and filled with the love you so desperately seek. The only way to realize this is to give yourself exactly that which you so desperately seek: total self love and self acceptance.

Giving any source your personal power is the worst thing you can do. It shrinks your vitality to live and keeps you constantly dependent upon something outside of yourself to give you worth - something you have no control over. It makes you codependent. Codependency is a psychological disease that can lead to physical ailments ranging from diabetes, heart disease, ulcers and even cancer. Giving someone else the power to give you love and worth qualifies an early, miserable senseless death.

In order to take back or begin to truly own your power and allow it to work for you - you have to fill your mind (which controls your beliefs) with things that celebrate who you really are. You have to distance yourself from friends, activities, relationships and habits that make you feel bad, wrong and inferior and replace them with positive reinforcements.

By learning to be kinder and gentler to yourself, you will automatically begin to reject anything that does not mirror your through and magnetically attract everything that does - whether positive or negative.

Remember, the power is within you and your beliefs will be your guiding force. Become your own biggest fan, begin to adore who you are and others will be compelled to give you the same treatment.