Relationships: Keep the Good and Cut Off the Bad

In the 1983 movie "Trading Places" two wealthy men played by Don Ameche and Ralph Bellamy did an experiment. They took a snobbish investors life played by Dan Aykroyd and traded it with a streetwise con-artist played by Eddie Murphy. Their thoughts were that each person would eventually become like the people they associate with. After Trading Places, it didn't take long for the con man to begin to act like his wealthy associates or for the investor to begin to turn to a life of crime. This movie gives us a perfect example of how much we are influenced by people we associate with and the importance of choosing our relationships wisely.

Choosing Personal Relationships:

You will have plenty of acquaintances throughout your life but true friends, I mean the die hard, be there when you are at your worse type of friends; they are worth all the tea in China. You need to cherish and protected these relationships. Everyone needs people in their life they can laugh with, cry with and yes even get angry with. Someone to share their struggles and hurts with who will not only understand but will keep their mouth shut about it as well. Find them, hang onto them and make sure you show them your appreciation.

People have a tendency to take advantage of those closest to them, often yelling and speaking to them in tones that they wouldn't even speak to a stranger with. People also have a tendency to forget that those closest to them still need for us to let them know they are important to us. A card, letter or phone call letting them know they are special to you will go a long way. Flowers or other small token gift will do wonders as well, especially with your spouse. If you are a parent, don't forget to let your children know that you love and appreciate them as well. Conversations between parents and children often major on direction and criticism instead love and affection. A little note of encouragement, a bouquet of flowers for your daughter or a note in your sons backpack telling them how proud you are of them will do wonders for your relationship. Even as you read this people are popping into your mind that you have neglected, grab a pad and make a list of whom they are and when you are done reading this article put a plan of action together. Go through your contact list and see who you need to give an Atta-Boy to. Do this every month and put it on your calendar, Day-Timer or in your Outlook To-Do list with an alarm to remind you. This simple task will help your good relationships stay strong and strengthen your weak ones.

Choosing Business Relationships:

There is an old but true saying that you cannot soar with the eagles when you hang out with turkeys. If you want to be more successful in business and employment, you must develop relationships with like-minded individuals. Those who want to succeed and grow hang out with those who work the hardest and get paid the most. If you hang around with those who just try to get by, do the least amount of work, and are always complaining; don't expect to advance. Intentionally develop relationships with people who are more successful than you are, especially those who have already succeeded in areas you wish to succeed in. Learn from them, pick their brain and ask them to share some of their tactics with you. People love to talk about themselves and their accomplishments, take advantage of it and learn all you can.

Limiting Negative Relationships:

Watch your relationships closely. People you associate with will have a huge impact on your life. They will encourage you, help you succeed and lift you up, or they will discourage you, hold you back and put you down. Spend the least amount of time with the later. Associate with people that make you feel good, have a positive outlook on life and encourage you to be your best. If you find yourself in relationships that rob you of your joy and motivation, either help them change or cut them off because attitudes are contagious. People who are depressed cause other people to become depressed and whiners and complainers motivate others to complain and whine. The more time you spend with joyful, energetic, positive people the quicker their optimistic outlook will rub off on you.

Your circle of friends are also your circle of influence. All you have to do is look at their lives and ask yourself if they headed in the direction you want your life to go? Even if you are just like them, if your life is not what you would like it to be, you need to begin to hang with people whose life most closely matches your dreams.

God gives us the freedom of choice and that includes the people we associate with. Choose wisely.