Relationships: When Opposites Attract, What Happens?

When opposites attract and start a relationship there are several things that can happen. Let's explore three different outcomes for couples that don't seem to have that much in common. There's a lot of excitement at first, which is what initially causes the electricity in the first place, but that may not last, and they may end up with the relationship from hell!

Most people know that when opposites attract it can be very exciting. This person is so different from you, which makes them that more interesting, at least at first. However, when the relationship starts to progress problems can start popping up all over the place. Remember that which made them so exciting in the first place is now just an annoyance because it's hard to agree on anything.

To give you an idea about what I'm talking about let's look at when two dysfunctional opposites come together. One fills up the other in ways they cannot fill themselves up with. For example, the anal-retentive perfectionistic, workaholic, who chooses the out going, fun loving, somewhat irresponsible child like, counter part. He tries to experience vicariously through her, a little bit of fun out of life, while she thinks someone else can do all the work, and worrying. Yes, these are two opposite people. The problem here is that two whole people have not come together.

Now, not all opposites that come together are dysfunctional. Sometimes, they just enjoy the excitement of someone different, hoping to keep a spark, and a mystery throughout their relationship. This can turn out to be a healthy relationship, depending on how it's handled along the way, and the two involved are mature, realistic, healthy individuals.

Okay, now to the outcomes I was talking about. When opposites attract there are three common outcomes for these opposites who attract.

The first outcome is the one where the relationship ends because they couldn't handle the differences long term. Once the sexual attraction was over and they tried to come together on common ground, it was impossible. This couple started out in fantasyland, forgetting that somewhere down the road they would have to compromise, and make decisions on how to live their life together. They really didn't have a chance. Having things in common such as lifestyle, goals, morals, values, etc., is very important in relationships, they were just too different to make it work, and neither wants to give up what they want, which is so very different form the other.

The second outcome is pertaining to the dysfunctional couple. From the very beginning they came together for the worst reasons imaginable. When both say you complete me, that's a red flag in itself. A partner should help to enhance who you are, Not complete you. This couple may actually stay together for quite awhile. After all they are at least on the same page about completing each other. It's an unsaid agreement, you make up for what I'm missing, and I'll make up for what you're missing. However, somewhere down the line one of them is going to do some growing and really lose interest in a piece of the puzzle that no longer fits.

The third outcome is that both individuals are whole, healthy functional human beings. They are clear about the differences and are excited to learn from one another. They know how to compromise and work out problems easily that may come along down the road. They are usually an adventurous couple. They both agree that the differences between them are more positive than negative.

There you have it, three common outcomes for opposites who attract. If you should meet someone who is opposite of who you are, my best advice is to be realistic, make sure you are both healthy, whole individuals, or you might end up very disappointed with this type of relationship!