Religion/Belief: Is It Time to Change Your Path?

We all get to this point from time to time and it is normal to doubt your belief and faith when things get tough, but what happens when you suddenly no longer find any fulfillment or peace in what you once believed? What happens when every inch of your being screams that this is all just a big joke and you are the brunt of it?

Regardless if you consider yourself a Buddhist, Hindu, Moslem, Christian or Pagan we each have our own personal God(s)/ Goddess that we go to for aid. We kneel and pray for help, wisdom and guidance and hope that miraculously an answer will come to us. We may study our various "Book of truth" to see what our Creator has in mind for us. We more or less (depending on the person) even practice what we preach and try to live by the guidelines set for us. When times get tough we find solace in what we do, we find a "friend" in those that are our spiritual guardians and even find a bit of safety in our heavenly homes. Of course we all rant and rave at those that are supposed to govern us when things just seem to get worst, but in the end we do come to our "senses" and return to our place of humility.

Even if you don't believe in any one particular higher power, if you consider yourself an atheist of sorts and believe only in the cosmos or science that can explain everything away, you still can hit that particular roadblock.

You suddenly have hit a blockade, a do not go any further sign that not even you can overlook. It suddenly no longer feels right. As humans we have a build in meter in our spirit that signals to us if something is right for us or wrong. We don't always listen to it, or heed it. It is such a small voice inside of us that is it easily overheard. All the other voices of the universe around us scream so much louder, but this tiny little voice only whispers. It won't make us do anything, but simply guides us in one direction or the other if we are still enough to listen to it.

This is the point I am talking about. I am not talking of a temporary loss of faith, but an actual "inner voice" telling you this is wrong! What happens then? You may doubt that you have even heard this voice, you may think that you are being "led astray", but this feeling of wrongness doesn't go away. In fact you feel it growing stronger. You may even start feeling sick deep inside when you get around it. You feel as if something is missing inside of you. You feel as if you are being called, but are lost as to where this voice is coming from. I am using the word "voice" very loosely in this case since it isn't really a voice at all. It is a call never the less like an invisible hand reaching out to you and urging you closer.

When you have reached this point of complete disconnectedness with what you once believed in, it won't matter what you try to do. You won't be able to return to it the way you once did. It won't matter, who will say what to you, and it will no longer feel right or even sound right. If anything, those words will only anger you on a very deep level and you won't understand why you feel that way either.

Essentially you may feel like a ship adrift in a very big ocean. You notice I am using the word "feel" a lot here, because as a human being we do react on feelings. It is a "feeling" that will spurn us on to do most things.

What may make it even worst is that you feel as if you are betraying those who believe the same way you do, or are completely against what you are experiencing deep inside. You may feel like an outcast and are afraid to lose those you love if you follow your instinct. The problem here is that in the end it won't matter. If you don't follow that instinct that tells you that this is wrong and force yourself to go through the motions, you will only feel more and more disconnect not only from your "God", the people around you, but from your own self.

I personally believe that just because someone is giving me an interpretation of something doesn't mean that they are 100% correct, nor that they are 100% wrong. They may have the right general idea and are only there to deliver a message to you, but you think that you have to swallow everything whole. That isn't so at all, you are wonderfully made with a good and sound mind. You have all the wisdom in the universe right there inside of you. Doesn't feel like it, does it? We do, we have access to all the knowledge and wisdom of whatever created us, and still is creating everything around us, we just don't remember how to unlock it. We have forgotten how to read the signs, how to hear that small voice inside of us that is the key.

Perhaps you are dealing with a major issue in your life right now like most of us are. You are having problems keeping your bills paid, your health is failing, you are watching your relationships falling apart etc. You are in deep despair and now you are even loosing your feeling of connectedness with what used to keep you "sane" and going. Do you realize that when you take hope away from someone you have taken everything away from them? Without hope we as humans can not achieve anything besides the destruction of ourselves and those we claim to love.

Holding on to something that no longer is right for you, struggling to "make yourself believe" in it, is about the stupidest thing you can do. You may lie to others, you can even lie to yourself for a while, but eventually you can't lie to your spirit and that little small voice inside of you. Watch as it becomes harder and harder for you to continue to go about your day. Perhaps even try to make your living. Your mind becomes too scattered to even think things through anymore. You truly are being kept helpless until you finally throw your hands up in dismay and say..."Fine, I am listening! What do you want from me?" You may not address those words to anyone in particular, you may not even know who to address them to, but you know they are the right words never the less, because you have finally opened some sort of door.

You listen intently, and nothing comes out! You can't hear the answer, and you think you must surely be going nuts. You don't hear anything, because you still are not quiet yet. Our minds are never quiet, the constantly keep talking. They have their own personal little dialog going on consistently, and until we can shut that shattering up for just a few moments we won't get any answers.

The next question we usually shout at the invisible "being" is: "Why are you doing this to me? Why aren't you helping me?"

But we are being helped, we just don't see it. We are being shown quiet clearly when something has come to an end and is no longer good for us. As humans we will hang on to something with the tenacity of a Bulldog, because we are used to it. We may hate it, we may even know it is bad for us or wrong but we still hang on to it, because we are familiar with it.

We are scared that we may make a mistake and don't even realize that by forcing our-selves to pretend that everything is perfectly ok with our own now no longer valid for us belief, we are actually committing the biggest mistake.

So how do you know which way to turn? You won't right at first; you may not for a long time. What you need to do first is however stop doing what you are doing. Try to get quiet inside of yourself. Remember you have to swim before you can reach the Island. Start listening to things around you. Start asking questions. Start listening not only with your mind, but with your spirit as well. Don't fall for the first thing you hear either. If you are a bit more intoned already with your inner being for whatever reason, you may suddenly get the urge to talk to a particular person. To humble yourself enough to tell them that perhaps they were right at least part of the way and you are ready to hear a little bit more. Remember you don't have to believe everything you hear and make it yours without filtering it through your personal Bullshit filter first.

Sometimes you may feel that you had been part of the path you need to return to before and had left it because of something that had happened. Maybe you were on the right track once before, but had to take a detour because you needed to gather some new experiences first. Perhaps it was necessary to step away from your path, because you had to gather some people to you first that you would never had met otherwise. Remember that we don't know why we have to experience what we do. We are ALL here for a reason, regardless what that reason is. We are ALL equally important to the fabric of humanity, even those that we consider "Monsters". Remember, that if they would not be, we wouldn't have a measuring stick against which to hold our own personal moral compass and adjust it.

When the time comes that you are once again at the Crossroads of your spiritual existence and you feel strongly drawn away from what you were doing up until now, then follow your new path. It may be hard, scary and rather lonely at first, but in the end you will be better off following your instincts then going against them all the time.

Realize that you can not force anyone to go with you on that path however, so you will have to choose if you are ready to have your motives questioned. In extreme cases you may even have to be willing to go it alone, but regardless of what the outcome, staying where you are no longer content and filled with your personal light is the wrong option.

Good Travel everyone!