Remembering Sept. 11th

On the morning of September 11th, 2001, I was sleeping with my 3 month old son. I was a news junky, and my boyfriend at the time had our TV on, tuned to the nationwide news. I crawled awake and opened my eyes to a picture of the World Trade Center. One of the Towers was on fire.

"Is this for real?" I demanded. "Is it a movie?"

It wasn't. Before he could answer, I screamed.

I watched an airplane crash into the second Tower.

I screamed and screamed, tears blurring my vision.

I didn't know anybody in New York City. I definitely didn't know anyone who worked at the World Trade Center.
It was the horror of that act that made we weep and cling to my infant son. I called my other 3 children into my room, and gathered them close to me, clinging to them as we watched the Towers burn.

When George Bush made his announcement, I was almost physically ill. His lack of reaction repulsed me. I couldn't believe he wasn't on his way to New York to take command of the situation.

Instead, he flew around in Air Force One until the coast was apparently clear.

We heard about the plane that crashed into the Pentagon, and my tears continued.

I'm reminded of all this because I'm now watching On Native Soil: 9/11 Commission Report on Court TV.

I'm further saddened by all the attempts that were made to get the alert out. Information that was on-hand before the attacks; information that was ignored or not passed along once the attacks began; incorrect information, delivered to fighter jets sent to stop the plane heading for Washington.

I wept for the passengers that fought their hijackers and died in Pennsylvania. I screamed again when Tower 2 collapsed. A reporter nearby had to run for his life as the dust and debris rolled toward him.

Watching this Report as I write this, I'm weeping again. I'm mad as hell. I'm angry because this tragedy was visited upon innocents. I'm sad because so many died who didn't have to. I'm crying as I watch and listen to survivors of the attacks. The families left behind are still fighting for answers. Our government plays the Duck-n-Dodge Blame Game, while people grieve, even five years later.

Cooperation was nil. Across the board communication was zero. A tape of an air traffic controller commander speaking with the FAA inflamed me.

"Do we wanna think about scrambling aircraft?"
"Oh…I don't know."
"Well, somebody's gonna have to make that decision in the next ten minutes or so."
"Well…everybody just left the room."

The FAA knew for 15 minutes that a plane was off its flight pattern and heading for Washington…a second plane, mind you. The one they sent fighters after was already smoldering at the Pentagon. They did not scramble aircraft. It was as if no one wanted to be responsible for the call.

Now, they are all responsible for all those deaths. The FAA; the FBI; the NSA; the President; the air traffic managers that refused entry to a controller who had information about a plane off radar; the guards at Dulles airport who allowed men who set off the metal detector to board the planes anyway; the people who issued student Visas on applications that were incomplete and incorrect.

The blame list is too long. In every tragedy, the list of middlemen and such is long. At the top, if you go high enough, there's always one man.

This Report reveals a plethora of mistakes made, balls dropped, and failure in the status quo. I watched it as I wrote this, and I went into the living room to set the DVR to record the encore showing. I plan to preserve this program for my children. They were all young in 2001. I don't know if they understood why I clung to them all that morning.
They asked to go outside in the backyard, and my immediate reaction was NO. I was afraid, terrified that they may be harmed. In the next breath, I realized this was what terrorism does. It strikes fear into the soul of everyday people.
I let my kids go outside that day.
I let them go to school.
I let them go to parties.

In these small ways, I thumb my nose at the terrorists, and all the people who failed to prevent September 11th.
I educate my kids as to the way of the world. My 5 year old asked to watch the news with me yesterday. I instill the need for knowledge in all of them. I don't sugar coat the world at large. They are happy people, but they know how cold and ugly the world can be.

Knowledge is the only weapon we have sometimes. Using it wisely can save lives.

The program on Court TV aired August 21, 2006 at 10 pm EST. An encore presentation airs at 2am EST, August 22, 2006.