Resume

I learned to type with one hand so that
perhaps I could hold a cigarette in the other
or sip coffee or lemonade or do whatever
I learned to simultaneously
answer the phones, discuss the weather,
balance books on one wrist
while taking down names and dates and numbers
and stapling paper

I'm as scattered as the rice they used to throw at weddings
as useful as your eight tracks
I might make a nice coaster in your living room maybe
or just be lethal to pigeons

I have a decent pain tolerance
my hands are numb from holding fire
and my mind is blank, too
I don't feel enough to be hurt
so go ahead and take the courtesy to be honest

I'm fair and fairly creative
I'm equal to compromise
I'll eat whatever is leftover in your fridge
I always try to do my best
so I'm not concerned by your best

I can laugh when it's time to be serious
I might not understand your jokes
I appreciate value in all aspects
I can handle deadlines, whatever pressure
I work like there is no tomorrow
and better if I hurry
so don't worry if it seems I procrastinate

I think you'll find
I'm not the candidate you expected
I won't be surprised if you pick someone else
I can tell by now you already know
I'm not like anyone else