Review: TNA Impact December 6, 2007

Dramatic video for Turning Point recap: "hungry young superstars" like Eric Young, who upset James Storm, "those on top" wanting to stay there, like 3D (?) beating the Guns and Lethal, Steiner, Senshi, Petey Williams, and BG James get the cases in Feast or Fire. KONG gets DQ'd and goes nuts, Angle and Cage continue the drama. "Can't We All Just Get Along?," the screen says. Oh, no, not that again.

Mike Tenay over video of the case winners arriving today: BG first, followed by Steiner, Petey, then Senshi, with Christopher Daniels chewing his ear off that Senshi needs to hand it over to him...

Here we are at the Impact Orlando Universal Zone. Tonight, will the cases be opened? Who's fired? Tenay interviews James Mitchell. And Gail Kim's going to compete tonight despite her can of butt-whoop from last night...

RELLIK/BLACK REIGN VS. LAX

Rellik and Reign jump LAX to start, with their punchy/kicky thing. Homicide stops a whip by Rellik, then tries to leg-scissor him down, Rellik stalls it, tries an elbow drop, and misses, Homicide wrings the arm, Rellik picks Move Number One (punch) and uses it to break. Homicide to the corner, Rellik charges, eats boot, and Homicide breaks off a nice second-rope bulldog for two. Outside the ring, Hernandez and Reign slug it out, and Dustin Rhodes takes probably the worst corner-post whip I've ever seen, barely grazing it with his hand as he goes by. Tenay tries to cover, saying he "tried to avoid it." Ugh. Back in the ring, LAX goes for a double clothesline on Rellik, and blow that, sending Tenay scrambling again. To make up for it, a double whip, cross corner, big splash by Hernandez, clothesline by Homicide to finally knock Rellik down. Reign sneaks in the back as Rellik reverses Homicide's whip, then ducks too early and catches a kick. Homicide charges, but Rellik catches him and Reign clotheslines him into a sidewalk slam. Not bad. Thought I saw a pig fly. Rellik must pose and yell, so Reign gets in some punches. Homicide reverses the following whip, Rhodes jogs to the ropes (?), it's Homicide's turn to duck too early, Reign drops down and uppercuts him. Tag to Rellik. Homicide blocks a grapple, lands a few rights, runs the ropes, Rellik leapfrogs, Homicide slides under him, now Rellik runs the ropes and kicks Homicide in the chest, gets two. Guess Rhino really did get hurt last week, as West mentions "that same boot" put him out of Turning Point. Rellik cheapshots Hernandez to draw the ref, whips Homicide to near side, which drops him. Reign grabs his legs from outside and decorates the post with Homicide's happy zone while Rellik kicks him in the head. Talk about battling pain. Tag to Reign, who really looks winded. How sad is it to see Dustin Rhodes in this condition, once a promising rising star, now he can't even take Homicide's running back elbow right. Both men down and struggling to the corners, both tag. Hernandez wipes out Rellik with a 'line, gives Reign a Vader splash in the corner, then picks up Rellik like a baby and throws him down. Tag to Homicide, to second rope he goes while Hernandez holds Rellik. Reign knocks him down, though, Rellik charges the corner, Homicide leaps over him, catches his arm on the follow-up, and floats into a Gringo Cutter for 2 and 3/4ths. Outside, Hernandez is owning Reign like real estate. Back in, Rellik reverses Homicide's whip into the corner, Homicide dodges the charge, Rellik bites steel, and a rollup finishes it. Wasn't totally unwatchable. C-

YOUR beatdown time is Rock and Roll Infection finally coming after LAX over the Hemme attack of nearly a month ago. They're getting the best of it, too. Here comes the bandido, who promptly slapjacks Christy Hemme yet again. Oh, looky there, that's no man if you look closely at the top of her shirt, but RRI doesn't know that, and they've got her set up for a slapjack shot of her own. LAX recovers, though, and Rave ducks under a slapjack shot by Homicide and bails. He tries Hoyt, and gets knocked on his rear end for his troubles. Hernandez is challenging Hoyt with the slapjack, Hoyt acts like he's ready, but ducks the shot and is out the other side. They come for the still-downed Hemme, but Hoyt pulls her out. Now, will RRI realize that's a woman before they hit her and be the only ones to break the no-man-on-woman violence rule? STAY TUNED!

Now to Cornette's office, where they hype the cases and that they'll reveal them. Matt Morgan's got them in what he thinks is a safe place, being watched by Crystal. Cornette isn't happy, asks Morgan if he would give gasoline to an arsonist? He sends Morgan to get them, prompting Jim to complain about his blood pressure. Here comes 3D and Johnny Devine to raise it further. Cornette demands they return the X-Division title belt, Bubba accuses him of having no testicles, just like the X-Division. Apparently, Jay Lethal and the Motor City MachineGuns were close by and heard the comment, and challenge the boys to a ladder match tonight.

Now back to Tenay and West to further hype that.

And now Angle and the Alliance are hitting the ring to run their mouths. Did my VCR catch Raw instead of Impact? We need a break...

Angle's calling on Christian Cage. At Turning Point, he says, I made a mistake, and we both lost our matches because we let them do what they wanted to do, divide and conquer us. You need me, I need you. With you and Robert Roode joining us, we can be a force that'll never be beaten. Time to avenge our losses. I'm giving you one hour to answer, to meet face to face to make things right.

JB has Cage and Roode. He asks if Cage accepts Angle's plea. Was that a plea, Cage asks, or was that begging? Roode cuts in, saying that with all due respect, there's power in numbers, yada yada. Cage cuts in, with all due respect, when did you earn the right to speak up? Speak when spoken to. He blames Roode for Sunday's loss to Kaz and Booker T. How many world titles have you won? Sit there and shut up. Roode says, I'm not AJ, watch yourself. Cage agrees, saying AJ is more intelligent. As for Angle, he'll be there.
O.D.B. vs. TNA KNOCKOUT CHAMPION GAIL KIM

The match is non-title, which is good for Kim after seeing the beatdown KONG laid on her last night. She got DQ'd for refusing to release a choke, then went batty, powerbombed the ref, knocked out Angelina Love (I think, it was over so fast I couldn't tell) with a chokeslam, then tossed a chair and hit Velvet Sky (another guess), before powerbombing Kim onto said chair. Which is why Kim's selling an injury on the way to the ring. Good job. The crowd's darling ODB jumps her to start, then rams Kim's head into the second turnbuckle, then right to the back with clubbing blows. Smart move. Picks up Kim, spins around, and puts a little hot sauce on that bodyslam to further hurt the back. That gets only one. Kim tries a comeback, but ODB knees her in the gut to stop that. Hard whip to corner, and you can see the wind come out of Kim. ODB gets down in her face and screams, Kim's up and fighting again, but another knee stops that, and gets back to the back. Whips Kim near side, Kim ducks a 'line, goes for a cross-body, but ODB catches her and gives her an overhead slam. Then nips up, does some yelling, breast-grabbing, and faux drinking. She's all lady, folks! Kim sneaks in a small package on the turnaround, but ODB nails her with a clothesline after, getting two. Kim reverses a whip to the corner, ODB meets the charge with an elbow. Up to the top rope, grabs Kim by the hair, time for the Dirty Dozen, but it's only a Dirty Triple, as Kim blocks with her boot, punches ODB, and joins her on the top, trying for the top-rope hurancanrana, but ODB holds on and drops Kim hard on her face. ODB jumps off, but Kim kinda-sorta spears her on the way down. Now she has some forearms for ODB, ducks a clothesline, drops her with an elbow, another, and now a running dropkick. ODB reverses the follow whip, Kim jumps to the second rope, hits a cross body for two. Crowd is behind ODB big-time despite the underdog act. Wow. Knee on the recover by ODB, whip to corner, Kim slings over, ODB gets a little iron in her diet, then Kim runs up, wheelbarrows ODB, and bulldogs her for a near-fall. Kim tries a fireman's carry, but ODB slips off, and yanks Kim down by her ponytail. Yeeouch. Kim's had it. She rushes ODB into the corner and goes off, punching, choking, whatever. The ref tries to step in to get her off, giving ODB the chance to grab the flask, cold-cock Kim, and get the win. Ending stunk, but the rest was pretty good. C

This time, YOUR beatdown time is brought to you by AWESOME KONG! ODB starts to pour some liquor on Kim when she hears the music, then decides discretion is the better part of valor. ODB's not on the list at the moment, anyhow, and she goes to work on Kim, getting her up for the powerbomb, but Kim slugs her way out, ducks a clothesline and gets some more Kong. Here comes security, and Kim doesn't care, she's right back in Kong's face. Now out comes Love and Sky to pull the champ out to protect her from herself.

Back in the case room, where Triple-X, Christopher Daniels, Senshi, and Elix Skipper are arguing. Daniels wants the case, Senshi tells him to come get it. Morgan's there, he smells money, sets up a match. Skipper wants to ref since it's a family affair, Morgan allows it. He puts on the big-league to impress Crystal, saying he's putting the six-man off one more slot to put Senshi-Daniels on. She asks if that's supposed to be Cornette's decision, he responds that that's why Cornette put him there, for his and TNA's best interests. He takes Senshi's case and walks off.

JB has Tomko, who asks him what he thinks, as he's the only one they haven't heard from. Christian is Christian, he says, and he'll do what he wants. What do you think?, JB presses. Tomko says he's going to start doing what he wants to do.

CHRISTOPHER DANIELS VS. SENSHI (GUEST REFEREE: ELIX SKIPPER)

Daniels talks to the lights for a little, as usual. NASCAR driver/announcer Hermie Sadler joins the boys in the booth. Lock up, arm twist by Daniels, reversed to a twist by Senshi, Daniels trips him up, goes to ropes, cartwheels over a prone Senshi, but he grabs Daniels' arm on the way over for another twist. Daniels drops to his back and pushes off with the feet to break. Senshi swings wild, Daniels ducks, grabs him in a waistlock from behind, goes to the ropes, Senshi holds on and shrugs him off, then kicks the kneeling Daniels hard across the chest, and another. The preacher man begs off, Senshi kicks his hands away, then preaches the Gospel of My Right Foot Across Your Face to Daniels, who drops like a stone. He staggers to the corner, gets a foot choke from Senshi, struggles out to the apron. Senshi's got him, bending him backwards over the ropes, but Daniels drops him, throat first, to counter. Maybe they can talk Sadler into replacing West, he knows his stuff. He references Skipper's top-of-the-cage hurancanrana in a 2005 match, and Tenay praises him for his knowledge. Daniels slips in, gives Senshi a hard back elbow to drop him. He looks to the lights, and they tell him to choke Senshi, so he does. Eric Young is driving a limo up outside, so we must see it. Out of it come Booker T, Samoa Joe, Kaz and Kevin Nash. It's so important that we'll forget about the match until after the break...

Back in, Senshi catches a charging Daniels with a back elbow, then a running forearm to the top of the head, a second, misses a third, but hits a rolling kick to Daniels' face on the recover. Nice sequence. To top it off, he runs to the other side, jumps up on the second rope, jumps off and kicks the sermon out of Daniels' mouth, getting two. Daniels counters with a jawbreaker, both men stumble to opposite corners. Now Sadler analyzes Skipper's refereeing. Seriously, sign the guy up! Daniels charges, misses a high knee, then catches both of Senshi's feet on the running dropkick. He goes to the top, trying to hit the Warrior's Way (double stomp to chest), but Daniels moves. Senshi runs to the other side, starts to break out the tumbling clothesline, but Daniels pulls Skipper in the way, Senshi stopping short of crushing Skipper, giving Daniels the opening for the cheap shot, and a double-underhook face crusher, for the win and the case. This was all called by Sadler, who needs this job NOW! Best match of the night so far. B-

Back in the case/argument room, where the Voodoo Kin Mafia are having a disagreement. BG asks Morgan if there's a tag title shot in his case, he can choose the partner, right? Morgan says yes. Kip isn't amused, saying he's his partner. BG wonders if he should be. They argue some more, BG backs up, grabs the case, and starts to leave. Roxie Leveaux gets spooked, saying the case is cursed. BG shoots back that only his current company is cursed. Kip runs off screams, Roxie twitches for a little bit longer, and that's that. Oh-kay.

Because you can never have too much talking, here's interview time, Tenay with the human jack-o-lantern, James Mitchell. Tenay asks to go back to the roots of the relationship, but doesn't say with whom. Mitchell says he'll take you back to birth, a good father, teaching his child right, but the problem was Chris's mother. (?) Tenay asks, You knew Chris since he (ah, it's a guy, OK, that narrows it down) got out of prison, how do you know about his childhood? You can almost see the candle inside Mitchell's head. I've done my research, he says, wickedly.

Ah, it's about Abyss! Thanks, Tenay! And, since wrestling on a wrestling show is overrated, more talking!

Back to the Howie Mandel Zone, Crystal with Petey Williams, who calls himself "Maple Leaf Muscle." Keeping a straight face for us both, she asks what that's about. Williams looks like Crystal kicked his dog. If you'd get your nose out of Kurt Angle's gluteus maximus (that's butt, he tells the camera), you'd know I've had a great week, winning "Maple Leaf Muscle" in my hometown, Windsor, Ontario, Canada (but he's not bragging on this). And guess who one of the judges was? Ah-nold! He does a funny Governator impression, saying Arnold called him one of the best bodybuilders he's ever seen, nyah, nyah, nyyyaaahhhh! So, in response to the original question (yes, there was a question), Williams wants the case to have a World title shot, not an X-Division shot as Crystal suggested. Morgan loves the ambition, Petey flexes, Crystal pokes his boob, and then Petey's off with the case.

Up next, more talking! Will Cage give his answer to Angle's offer? Will there be an actual match soon? Stay tuned!

Angle and Co. are in the ring. He's waited long enough, the champ waits for no one, what's it gonna be? Here comes the Instant Classic, led by Roode, followed by Ms. Brooks. Roode has the mic, and joins up pretty quick. After making the round of handshakes, Cage rips the mic out of Roode's hand. He calls him Bobby (West with his usual great analysis: "He hates that." BRING SADLER BACK!), says we're different, you need them, I don't. To Angle: You want to be my friend, huh? Like Brady and Moss, Owens and Romo? You keep friend close, enemies closer, and you know I'm the biggest threat to that title. To Tomko: Don't look at me, you make me sick! Look at me when I'm talking to you! You were in poverty, a crappy prison guard in a crappy prison, when I found you. Your family should thank me for putting food on your table. With me, you're somebody, without me, you're back to what you always were, a nobody! To AJ: You...you. I saw the most potential in you, more than anyone else in my life, in the ring. Outside, I helped you talk to the crowd, molded you in my image, made you a star. You said I'm like a father to you? I'm not your blood father, but if I was, I'd disown you. (AJ does a great crushed face). Back to Angle: I'm gonna lay it on the line. You all need me to be somebody. He tells Karen to shut up and get behind the men where she belongs. Who peed in his Cheerios? Oh, yeah, all of them, right, got it. Fine, I'll be part of the team, but I'm the leader, you do as I say. AJ, when I say jump, you say how high. (AJ nods and meekly says yes.) That includes you, Angle. West doesn't believe he'll accept. Are you willing, Cage asks, to admit you're nowhere near the man I am? Karen's furious, Tomko tells her to back off. Cage offers his hand, West says no way again, but Angle takes it! He shakes hands with everyone, except AJ, who he gives a disappointed look to, then offers his hand, and Mega-Dork hugs him. Hey, that's Samoa Joe's music! Maybe he's coming to kick some...no, he has a mic, dang it. And Kaz, Nash, Young, and Booker, too. Let's do a 10-man tag at Final Resolution, he offers. No, Karen says, let's do this tonight, and calls out Sharmel, calling her a stalking, crazy tramp. Sharmel has the mic, saying if this is past issues, your husband was trying to put his hands on me, and I wouldn't let him. What you should worry about is me putting my hands on you, now it's time to whip that hiney (add adult word there). The women start to converge, the husbands pull them away, and the match is set. There BETTER be more talking!

OH, goody! Crystal has 3D and Devine. Crystal asks Bubba to give credit where it's due for Lethal and the Guns making the challenge. Bubba mocks her, tells her to shut up, tells her she wouldn't know a real man if he stood between her skinny legs, and offers to feed her to Devon, since she's his type, short, dumb and white. Ah, yes, it is the time of year when cavemen hibernate, that's why him so cranky. Summing up the next pointless two minutes: You're not real men yet, we'll beat you up and steal the belt yet again. You're welcome. He then grabs Crystal, pulls her head back, and kisses her chin. I hope she's had all her shots.

TEAM 3D/JOHNNY DEVINE VS. BLACK MACHISMO/MOTOR CITY MACHINEGUNS

They show video from Sunday, of Lethal giving Devine the Savage Elbow through the table, but with no ref, Bubba switches their positions, ref sees Devine on top, gives 3D/Devine the match.

Oh, wait, more talking first! It's Scott Steiner! Engaging Steiner transcription mode: mumble-mumble-I'm huge-mumble-mumble-'roids are good-mumble-mumble-I'll take the case-mumble-mumble-I'm gone. Crystal says there's a problem, Cornette wanted you to watch them, and they're all gone. Who better, Morgan says with a head pat, to watch them than the guys who won them? Right over your head...

Lethal's got the big entrance, pyro and all, the Guns run around him, and they all hit the ring, and after the better part of a FREAKIN' HOUR, there's some action. Punches, punches, punches in bunches, Lethal showing some of Savage's punches. OK, no more rhymes now, I mean it (Anybody got a peanut? AHHHHHHH!) Lethal knocks Devine out, follows him out with a slingshot cross-body. The Guns enziguri the D's out of the ring, then run to the opposite side and hit STEREO SUICIDE DIVES on the D's, knocking them into the railing. While the Guns beat them down, Lethal whips Devine into their side's railing, and gets the ladder into the ring and sets it up. OUCH! Devine stops him, then grabs both of Lethal's arms, and stomps his chest while holding them, bouncing him off the mat each time. Devine now heads up, and Lethal and Sabin stop him. Sabin's turn, and Devine stops him by putting him on his shoulders. Sabin punches his head a couple times, then does a reverse 'rana to toss him! Sabin heads up again, this time, it's Devon, and he just drops straight back with Sabin on his shoulders.
Now Devon heads up, and there's Shelley with a powerbomb off the ladder to stop him. I mean, that's a lot of beef, so you'd be hurting like Shelley is right now. Time for a break, because, ah, hell...

Back in, Bubba's alone in the ring, gestures to the belt, starts climbing. Lethal's headed up the other side. Punch, punch, but Bubba stops that with a headbutt, then grabs Lethal for a vertical suplex, and nails it off the top of the ladder! Wicked spot! Devine walks through the wreckage, goes to the ladder, Shelley's there to stop him. Devine tries punches and kicks, but Shelley keeps coming, finally giving him a JAWBREAKER off the ladder! Devine flip-flops on the mat to sell it. Shelley runs at Devon, who, even more creatively, hits his crappy inverse DDT. Now he goes up. Sabin, to the apron from outside, springboards up and nails Devon with a clothesline. You do what you can with what you have. The Guns try to slingshot splash both D's outside, but they move and the Guns go splat. Lethal and Devine are climbing now. Lethal goes for the belt, Devine goes for the punches. Now, Devine goes for the belt and Lethal punches. They both go for the belt, it's off the holder, and it's a tug of war. Lethal wins it, he's got the belt, but the ref's distracted. In comes Bubba with a kendo stick, whacks Lethal, tosses the belt to Devine, and it's Groundhog Day, three more months of this crap. Oh, yeah, the match. Pretty good, all things considered. But when is Devon retiring? C

Back to the Mitchell interview, because, heavens above, we must have more talking. Abyss stood by and let dear, sweet old Dad get shot in the back three times by his boozing mother, and he can't get his pumpkin-like head around why. If you get an explanation from Chris, Tenay asks, will that end this obsession? I'm tired of being the bad guy, Mitchell responds, and next week, I'll call Abyss to the ring to face me, and this will end if he admits to me and the world the secret we both know. At least this talking develops character.

BUT IT'S STILL TALKING!

Crystal runs to Daddy Cornette's office, who hasn't seen the whole show because of meetings. Lucky b*****d. She wants Morgan to tell him. Tell him what?, Morgan replies. You signed matches? Never mind that, what about the cases? Morgan tells him the "good news" and Cornette looks like he's going to stroke out. We didn't want them to have the cases so they couldn't jimmy with the locks and see what was in them before we did on TV! Go get them!

10-MAN TAG: CAGE/ROODE/ANGLE/STYLES/TOMKO VS. JOE/NASH/KAZ/BOOKER/YOUNG

Tomko's gonna rip AJ's head off, I see it coming. Not tonight, not tomorrow, but soon. Pyro time! Come on, Eric! Nope, it still scared him. Break time!

Kaz and Styles to start. Arm twist by Kaz, to hammerlock, then a head scissors to take AJ down. Nice chain. Back up, Styles tries an palm thrust, Kaz ducks it, Styles wheelbarrows Kaz, rolls him up, gets two on a nice spot. Back up again, Kaz charges Styles, AJ presses him up and over, Kaz lands on his feet, gets a crucifix for two. Here we go again. Kaz ducks a Styles punch, wraps the waist, standing switch by AJ, Kaz drops to his butt, grabs a leg, Styles spins his other leg over Kaz, rolls him up for another two. Whoo, what a series this is! Kaz goes for an armdrag, Styles blocks, grabs Kaz's face, and throws him down. Kaz kicks him with both feet to block, both nip up at the same time, face off, and the crowd shows their love. Styles charges, Kaz hits a tilt-a-whirl slam, runs near side, kicks him in the head, far side, swinging neckbreaker, gets two. Styles counters with a jawbreaker, pushes Kaz to his corner, Angle tags himself in. He locks in a front facelock, Kaz punches out, goes for whip, Angle reverses, Kaz ducks a 'line, leg lariat, tag to Booker, to the ropes, hop-hop punch, hop-hop chop, hop-hop punch, hop-hop chop, yell to crowd. They trade kicks to the gut, Angle with a European uppercut, whip to ropes, Booker ducks a punch, nails Angle with a jump side kick for two. Angle bullrushes Booker back to corner, Roode tags himself in, and goes to work. Roode choking, a punch, goes for the whip, Booker reverses to a short whip and into a spinebuster. Tag to EY, kick to Roode, but a big punch stuns him, now a chop, reverse whip, Young gives Roode the Stone Cold Thesz Press. Roode rolls out and to a corner, catches Young with a boot when he gives chase, tag to Cage, double team kick to gut, another solo. Cage slaps Young, whip to far side, Young baseball slides under, takes him down and paintbrushes the back of Cage's head, then walks up his back in a funny spot. Cage is ticked, tries a punch, blocked, a right by Young, to corner, Cage reverses a whip, EY rolls up and over the corner to the apron, baseball slides under Cage into the ring and clotheslines him out, but Tomko jumps in to knock Young down. Nash gets in and knocks Tomko out, Young slingshots onto him and Cage, then Nash tosses Roode on the pile. Here comes Kaz, flying and crashing onto the heap. Nash is running! He stops short and smirks. OK, I'll give him that, that was a little funny. Time for a break...

Back on, every one of the heels getting thumped, Cage and Young in the ring, Cage gets the better of it and posts EY. Arm wringer and a snapdown or three, now a kick to the shoulder. Tenay says Young's been having problems with it, so nice psychology there. Tag to Styles, kick to Young's chest. Young fights out, runs the ropes, Styles leap-frogs him, then dives right at his feet, Young's over, and there's the SNIPER DROPKICK! Eric's sell: He hits the mat on his back, flips to his stomach and he plays dead. These guys seem to live to make that look awesome. Mega-Dork does his dance, then covers and gets two. Tag to Angle, big kick gets a jump sell from Young. Backbreaker gets two, lateral press again for two, now a rear chin lock. Tenay announces that the cases will be opened next week, oh, and if there's any more problems, Morgan is out of a job. Young fights up, pushes Angle to the corner, punches out, whips him across, Angle easily ducks the winded Young's charge, and nails a beautiful belly-to-back for two that looked to be three without the save of Joe and Booker. AJ comes in and switches with Angle, gets two on the lateral, AJ punches, whips Young, drops too early, Young kicks him, goes for the ropes again, AJ grabs him, locks in a waistlock, goes to tag out, but Young gets a standing switch, goes for atomic drop, Styles flips out of it, grabs Eric by the leg to prevent taggage, trips him down, Young stumbles to a corner, AJ charges and gets leather, comes back, now it's elbow, down goes AJ, up goes Young. AJ recovers and crotches him to stop the rally. Styles goes up with Young, tries a belly-to-back, Young tries to reverse and crash down on Styles, but doesn't get enough lift and lands shoulder-first on Styles' chest on the mat. Sloppy and dangerous there. Ref's probably checking for a pulse after that. Tag to Tomko, hot tag to Joe! Big boot to Joe stuns him, but he jumps and kicks Tomko in the head, runs the ropes, but Tomko snap-powerslams him. Now Tomko runs the ropes and Joe returns the favor, gives him an "in-your-face", goes for the cover, and Styles comes back from another nasty spot seemingly fine and moonsaults to break it up at two. The guy's tough, gotta give him that. Just as I write that, Kaz slings in over the top and DDT's AJ. Sweet spot. Tomko and Joe charge each other, and it's a car wreck on the Double Clothesline Highway. Tag to Roode, hot tag to Nash. Forearms for everyone. Alleged big boot for Roode. Whips Cage across, this time he gets the face, and Angle gets the same. Roode jumps in, tries a whip, Kevin reverses it, catches a sideslam (Spike bleeps out Roode's "commentary") and it takes Cage and Angle to save. They stomp Nash, in comes Booker, punches all around, kicks Angle in the gut to set up the axe kick, but Angle recovers and tries for an Olympic Slam. Booker floats out, kicks Angle again, but plays to the crowd too much, and Tomko pulls down the top rope to stop the axe kick. Joe's in, Roode stops him, whips him across, Joe stops before the rope, goes out over it backwards like a high jumper, and onto Styles and Tomko on the floor! Wow! Nash has a big boot for Roode, gets two, but Cage pulls the ref out before three. Nash goes to grab Cage off the apron, but Roode shows him that it pays to be Roode and hits him low. Cage slides in a chair, Roode grabs it, but Cage wants it. Roode gives it up. Young's climbing up the ropes behind them, dropkicks Cage in the back, who crashes into Roode chair-first. Nash grabs Roode, knee to gut, then a Jackknife powerbomb for the pin. Pretty good match, everyone showed up to play. B+

Ms. Brooks is laughing her butt off, that's funny. Roode and Cage are in each other's faces. Angle steps between them, Cage orders him out. Angle walks away, hands up, but picks up his belt, and you know what's coming. Down goes Cage. Tomko just shakes his head as Angle stomps away. Styles tries to break it up, while he does, Roode goes to work. Styles goes to stop him, and Angle starts again. AJ's trying to put a finger in the dam, but there's too many leaks. Tomko simply walks away. Cage is getting mauled. There's the anklelock! AJ's trying to pull him off, and that's how we end.

The last match redeems the show somewhat, but there was way, way too much talking, especially the last hour. This keeps up, and they'll be no different than the WWE if this continues. Prediction: Steiner gets World shot (unfortunately), Daniels gets the tag shot (just to be difficult), Williams gets the X-Division shot (whether he likes it or not), and BG gets the axe. Next week, folks...