Review: Whistle and I'll Come to You (1968)

I am always on the look-out for obscure horror films. In fact, those are generally the scariest, simply because you don't know what to expect. So when I heard about a short film (that was actually originally a television program that aired on the BBC about forty years ago) that a few people cited as one of the scariest they had ever seen, I knew I had to track it down. After all, it's not too often that a mere title is enough to send chills down my spine.

"Whistle and I'll Come To You" is based on a story by M.R. James, a noted medieval British scholar that also, for some reason or another, decided to write a ton of ghost stories. It tells the story of Professor Parkins, a scholarly old man that is staying at an inn somewhere, presumably in Britain. We follow him along his daily routines, which consist of eating breakfast, walking along the seaside, eating a packed lunch while watching the waves, and then walking through a cemetery.

One day, while walking amongst the gravestones, he spots something. It's a whistle, hiding between some twigs. Fascinated by the object, he pockets it before heading back to the inn. Once there, he cleans the whistle out before discovering that it bears a transcription. After translating it (to "Who is this, who is coming?") he blows into it, immediately resulting in an ominous breeze that blows through his room. The next night, the other bed in his room is apparently ruffled, even though the professor never slept in it. Could this be a ghost, or is there a more logical explanation?

Forget however creepy it sounds, "Whistle and I'll Come To You" is little more than an elongated mess, even at a paltry 41 minutes. The aforementioned scenes of the Professor going through his everyday routines take up about 35 of those 41 minutes, leaving the hauntings to take up the other six, and even they are relatively lackluster (save for one scene right after finding the whistle that is very creepy, and a dream sequence that admittedly made me jump). I will also admit that the show did do a good job of building up some slight suspense right after the discovery of the whistle (as you know something is going to happen), but after watching him eat breakfast a few more times, I totally lost interest. I hate to say it, but the word that best describes this is "boring".

On to the plusses, just so we end on a positive note: Michael Hordern is absolutely stellar as the eccentric Professor. The way he mumbles to himself and drags on sentences certainly gives himself a certain kind of unique charm, despite the fact that his character is rather arrogant.

I am fine with films that take a while to unfold. Some films take a while to get going, but set the viewer up for a fantastic twist at the end; in other words, they reward the viewer for sticking through it. Almost like a long joke with a hilarious punchline, it is well worth the wait. "Whistle and I'll Come To You", however, is a film that slowly builds to nothing, and the joke, unfortunately, is entirely on the viewer.

Rating: * * (out of 4)